"Various quotes about sex" joke

What do I know about sex? I'm a married man."
- Tom Clancy
"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesomethings that money can buy."
- Steve Martin
"You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither."
- Drew Carey
"Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as meaningless experiences go its pretty damned good."
- Woody Allen
"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand."
- Unknown
"If it weren't for pickpockets I'd have no sex life at all."
- Rodney Dangerfield
"Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very good; and when it is bad, it is better than nothing."
- Dick Brandon
"Science is like sex: sometimes something useful comes out, but that is not the reason we are doing it"
- Richard Feynman
"All pop music is about sex. Rock is about wanting to do it, jazz is about doing it, and country and western is about feeling guilty after you've done it."
- Robert Waldo Brunelle, Jr.
"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."
- Woody Allen
"I think there are two areas where new ideas are terribly dangerous: economics and sex. By and large, it's all been tried, and if it's really new, it's probably illegal or dangerous or unhealthy."
- Felix G. Rohatyn
"It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married."
- Matt Barry
"Love ain't nothin' but sex misspelled."
- Harlan Ellison
"Love is a matter of chemistry. Sex is a matter of physics."
- Unknown
"Programming is like sex. One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life."
- Michael Sinz
"Remember, if you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast."
- Woody Allen
"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."
- George Burns
"Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight are unimportant."
- Henry Miller
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible."
- P. J. O Rourke
"I bet that if you actually read the entire vastness of the U.S. Tax Code, you'd find at least one sex scene."
- Dave Barry