"What I Want In A Man!" joke
(Age 22)1. Handsome2. Charming3. Financially successful4. A caring listener5. Witty6. In good shape7. Dresses with style8. Appreciates the finer things9. Full of thoughtful surprises10. An imaginative, romantic lover(Age 32)1. Nice looking - preferably with hair on his head2. Opens car doors, holds chairs3. Has enough money for a nice dinner at a restaurant4. Listens more then he talks5. Laughs at my jokes at appropriate times6. Can carry all the groceries wit hease7. Owns at least one tie8. Appreciates a good home cooked meal9. Remembers anniversaries10. Likes to be romantic at least once a week(Age 42)1. Not too ugly- Bald head OK2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car3. Works steady- splurges on dinner at McDonald's on occasion4. Nods head at appropriate times when I'm talking5. Usually remembers the punch line of jokes6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture7. Usually wears shirt that covers stomach8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw top lids9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down10. Shaves on most weekends(Age 52)1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed to appropriate length2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public3. Doesn't borrow money too often4. Doesn't nod off to sleep while I'm emoting5. Doesn't re-tell the same joke too many times6. Is in good enough shape to get off the couch on weekends7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear8. Appreciates a good TV dinner9. Remembers your name on occasion10. Shaves on some weekends(Age 62)1. Doesn't scare small children2. Remembers where the bathroom is3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep4. Only snores lightly when awake (LOUDLY when asleep)5. Forgets why he's laughing6. Is in good enough shape to stand up alone7. Usually wears some clothes8. Likes soft foods9. Remembers where he left his teeth10. Remembers when...(Age 72)1. Breathing.....
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