"Where Are You Off To, Son?" joke
Early one morning, a man noticed his son leaving the house with a bundle of chicken wire. "Where are you off to, son?" asked the father.
"I'm off to catch some chickens," the son answered.
"You can't catch chickens with chicken wire, son," the father said, chuckling.
"Yes I can," insisted the son, as he continued on his way. Sure enough, later in the day, the son returned home with some chickens.
The next morning, the son was leaving the house early again, this time with some duct tape.
"Where are you off to, son?" the father inquired.
"I'm off to catch some ducks," replied the son.
"Son, you can't catch ducks with duct tape," yelled the father.
"Yes I can," argued the son, as he took off down the road. Later in the day, much to the father's surprise, the son returned home carrying a couple of ducks under his arms.
The following morning, the father saw his son leaving the house with a bunch of pussywillows.
"Hang on, son," shouted the father, "let me get my shoes!"
Three ministers - a Presbyterian, a Methodist, and a Baptist - and their wives were on a cruise. A tidal wave came up and swamped the ship; they all drowned, and before long, they were standing before St. Peter.
First came the Presbyterian and his wife. St. Peter more...
2 Scousers are riding along the M62 from Manchester to Liverpool on a motorbike. They break down and start hitching a lift. A friendly trucker stops to see if he can help and the scousers ask him for a lift.
He tells them he has no room in the wagon as he is carrying 20, more...
Knock Knock
Who's there!
Duncan!
Duncan who?
Duncan make your garden grow better! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Duncan!
Duncan who?
Duncan disorderly again! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Duncan!
Duncan who?
Duncan buscuits in more...
Dear Mom and Dad,
Our scoutmaster told us all to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and worried. We are OK. Only one of our tents and two of our sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily none us got drowned because we were all up on the mountain looking for more...
What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.