"Win the war with pig shit" joke

HOW TO WIN THE WAR:
Would this be chemical, biological, or psychological warfare?
"PIG SHIT!" That's right: pig shit. They can't be in contact with any pork product and go to "Allah". So what we do is load every tanker plane we have with "PIG SHIT" and spray their whole damned country with it.
Later we come in and flood all their caves with it. That way they will come into contact with a pork product and they won't want to die because they cannot go to Allah. For airline security we put a "Potbelly Pig" at each loading gate and everyone boarding the plane would have to rub its belly and kiss it on the head. Again, they wouldn't want to die because they cannot go to Allah.
To think...a war won with "PIG SHIT".
The head lines in the paper would read:
"AMERICANS WIN WAR WITH PIG SHIT" Nobody Lost in Shittiest Battle ever fought."

A story is told of a Jewish man who was riding on the subway reading an Arab newspaper. A friend of his, who happened to be riding in the same subway car, noticed this strange phenomenon. Very upset, he approached the newspaper reader.
"Moshe, have you lost your mind? more...

23
8

Jim had a date with a really, hot blonde and in preparation for it, he went on the rooftop of his apartment building to get a tan. Not wanting to have any tan lines, he decided to sunbathe in the nude. Unfortunately, Jim fell asleep. When he finally woke up, he was sunburned more...

13
8

A man is in court. The Judges says,"on the 3rd August you are accused of killing your wife by beating her to death with a hammer, how do you plead?"
"Guilty", said the man in the dock.
At this point a man at the back of the court stood up and shouted more...

29
18

A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...

465
213

Quasimodo, the bell-ringer for the Notre Dame cathedral in Paris, goes to the cardinal. "Cardinal, I'm getting pretty old and I'd like to retire, and live the rest of my life peacefully." The cardinal says, "That's fine Quasi, we'll just let the town crier know so more...

3
2
Be first to comment!
remember me
follow replies
Funny Joke? 22 vote(s). 68% are positive. 0 comment(s).