"You Know You Are A Korean Stylist If" joke
You think about Korean martial arts everyday. You begin to sprinkle Korean words and phrases into your conversation. You have a Korean dictionary which you never use. When you see a magazine rack you quickly check for new martial arts magazines first and read the articles on Korean martial arts first. You always make it a point to check the martial arts section of the bookstore and look for Korean martial arts books first. You shop for clothes based on your ability to high kick in them. Adidas is your favorite sports clothing brand. You sewed your school patch onto your bathrobe. You tie your monogrammed bathrobe belt (which you never wash) into a square knot and then check to make sure the ends are exactly even. You open the refrigerator door with a roundhouse kick and shut it with a side kick. You develop a taste for Korean food and other Asian food as well. You develop an interest in Korean members of the opposite sex. You look more to your sabumnim/kwanjangnim for guidance and advice rather than your priest. You take up smoking because your sabumnim/kangjangnim smokes. You take up drinking because your sabumnim/kwanjangnim drinks. You take up karaoke because your sabumnim/kwanjangnim likes to sing karaoke. You take up golf because your sabumnim/kwanjangnim plays golf. Even though you might hate to admit it, you secretly and subconsciously believe that Korean masters from Korea are better at Korean martial arts, even though they spend most of their time drinking, smoking, golfing and singing karaoke. Every time you see a Korean gentleman, you wonder what he knows about martial arts and what his rank is. You say "Yes sir!" more in class than you would if you were in the military. You donate more free time to your Korean martial arts school than you do your church. Your vacation time is devoted to attending Korean martial arts events. You visit cities that you would otherwise never visit because of Korean martial arts events. When visiting a new city, you grab the yellow pages and check out all the Korean martial arts listings. You plan on visiting Korea some day. You have a deeper interest in Korean martial arts culture and history than you do your own culture and history. You are prouder of your 1st Dan black belt certificate than your high school diploma, even though the high school diploma took you 13 years of 6 hour/day, 5 days/week training to get. The happiest moments of your life and your fondest memories have to do with Korean martial arts. You check out a potential place to live based on the suitability of working out and hanging a heavy bag. You don't lift heavy weights because it might slow you down. Being able to do the chinese splits is a major life goal for you. You like kicking walls when no one is looking. You view every little hand held item as a potential weapon. If you are younger than Chuck Norris, you think his kicks are slow and his techniques suck. If you are Chuck's age, you wish you could do half the things he is able to do. You try to figure out a way to incorporate techniques you see in movies and TV into your martial arts. You wonder why Blockbuster never carries any of those martial arts videos you see advertised in martial arts magazines. You buy your kids martial arts items for their birthday or for Christmas. You surf the internet looking mostly for Korean martial arts sites. The overwhelming majority of the email you receive is related to Korean martial arts.
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