"You know your in the 90's..." joke

You know your in the 90's...
25. When you consider Starbucks a food group.
24. When you schedule conference calls on your mobile phone while
you know you're gonna be stuck in traffic.
23. Whenever you hear an electric beeping, 90% of everyone in sight
reaches for their belts.
22. You find the words "conventional oven" archaic.
21. Cleaning up the dining area means getting the fast food bags out
of the back seat of your car.
20. Your reason for not staying in touch with family is that they do
not have email addresses.
19. Keeping up with sports entails adding ESPN's home page to your
bookmarks.
18. You have a "to do list" that includes entries for lunch and
bathroom breaks and they are usually the ones that never
get crossed off.
17. You have actually faxed your Christmas list to your parents.
16. Pick-up lines now include a reference to liquid assets and
capital gains.
15. You consider 2nd day Air Delivery and Inter-office Mail
painfully slow.
14. You assume any question about whether to valet park is
rhetorical.
13. You refer to your dining room table as the flat filing cabinet.
12. Your idea of being organized is multiple colored post-it notes.
11. Your grocery list has been on your refrigerator so long some of
the products don't even exist anymore.
10. You lecture the neighborhood kids selling lemonade on ways to
improve their process.
9. You get all excited when it's Saturday so you can wear sweats to
work.
8. You refer to the tomatoes grown in your garden as deliverables.
7. You find you really need PowerPoint to explain what you do for a
living.
6. You normally eat out of vending machines and at the most
expensive restaurant in town within the same week.
5. You think that "progressing an action plan" and "calendarizing a
project" are acceptable English phrases.
4. You know the people at the airport hotels better than your next
door neighbors.
3. You ask your friends to "think out of the box" when making Friday
night plans.
2. You think Einstein would have been more effective had he put his
ideas into a matrix.
And the number one sign that you work in the nineties...
1. You think a "half-day" means leaving at 5 o'clock.
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The junk merchant doesn't sell his product to the consumer,
he sells the consumer to the product. He does not improve
and simplify his merchandise, he degrades and simplifies
the client. -- William Burroughs, 1959
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