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Rules To Live By...
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I cannot accept, And the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I had to kill today because they pissed me off. Also, help me to be careful of the toes I step on today, as they may be connected to the ass that I may have to kiss tomorrow.
"Hello. Tech Support; may I help you?"
"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
"What sort of trouble?"
"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
"Went away?"
"They disappeared."
"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
"Nothing."
"Nothing?"
"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
"How do I tell?"
[Uh-oh. Well, let's give it a try anyway.] "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
"What's a sea-prompt?"
[Uh-huh, thought so. Let's try a different tack.] "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
[Ah-at least s/he knows what a cursor is. Sounds like a hardware problem. I more...
"Hello. Tech Support; may I help you?" "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
"What sort of trouble?" "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
"Went away?" "They disappeared."
"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?" "Nothing."
"Nothing?" "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?" "How do I tell?"
[Uh-oh. Well, let's give it a try anyway.] "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?" "What's a sea-prompt?"
[Uh-huh, thought so. Let's try a different tack.] "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?" "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
[Ah-at least s/he knows what a cursor is. Sounds like a hardware problem. I wonder if s/he's kicked out more...
Computer Illiterate Support Call
' Hello, Support Desk, may I help you?'
'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.'
'What sort of trouble?'
'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.'
'Went away?'
'They disappeared.'
'Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?'
'Nothing.'
'Nothing?'
'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'
'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?'
'How do I tell?'
[Uh-oh. Well, let's give it a try anyway.]' Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?'
'What's a sea-prompt?'
[Uh-huh, thought so. Let's try a different tack.]' Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?'
'There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type.'
[Ah--at least s/he knows what a cursor is. Sounds like a hardware problem. I more...
There is this good ol' barber in some city in US. One day a florist goes to him for a haircut. After the cut, he goes to pay the barber and the barber replies, "I am sorry, I cannot accept money from you. I am doing a community service."
The florist is happy and leaves the shop. The next morning when the barber goes to open his shop, there is a "Thank You" card and a dozen roses waiting at his doorstep. A cop goes for a haircut next and when he goes to pay the barber, the latter replies, "I am sorry, I cannot accept money from you. I am doing a community service."
The cop is happy and leaves the shop. The next morning when the barber goes to open his shop, there is a "Thank You" card and a dozen donuts waiting at his doorstep. An Indian software engineer goes for a haircut after that and while paying, the barber tells him, "I am sorry, I cannot accept money from you. I am doing a community service."
The next morning, when more...
Stress-Relieving PrayerLord, Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I cannot accept, And the wisdom to hide the bodies of those peopleI had to kill today because they pissed me off. And, help me to be carefulOf the toes I step on today as theyMay be connected to the assThat I might have to kiss tomorrow. Amen.