Air Jokes / Recent Jokes

For the first time U RAWANA got into a Air Ceylon plane to go abroad, as the usual flight delay U RAWANA fell asleep on the cosy seat. After short while U RAWANA woked up and ran towards the main door tried to open that. The air hostess shouted " wait,,, wait" But our man misunderstood that air hostess is asking his " weight"and jumped thro the door shouting "its 150 lbs"

An engineer dies and reports to hell. Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements. After a while, they''ve got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and the engineer is a pretty popular guy.

One day God calls Satan up on the telephone and says with a sneer, "So, how''s it going down there in hell?"

Satan replies, "Hey things are going great. We''ve got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there''s no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."

God replies, "What??? You''ve got an engineer? That''s a mistake - he should never have gotten down there; send him up here."

Satan says, "No way. I like having an engineer on the staff, and I''m keeping him."

God says, "Send him back up here or I''ll sue."

Satan laughs uproariously and answers, more...

A man flying in a hot air balloon realizes he is lost. Spotting a man down below, he reduces height and shouts:' Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?' The man below says:' Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field.'

'You must work in engineering!' says the balloonist.' I do,' replies the man.' How did you know?'

'Because,' says the balloonist,' everything you have told me is technically correct, but it's of no use to anyone.'

'You, my friend,' says the man below,' must work in management.'

'I do' replies the balloonist,' but how did you know?'

'Because,' says the man below,' you don't know where you are or where you're going, but you expect me to be able to help. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now it's my fault.'

Q:What should Iraq get for its air defense system? A:A refund.

Politeness is like an air cushion: There may be nothing in it, but it eases our jolts wonderfully. Samuel Johnson

A minister was sitting reading the newspaper, and listening to the ball game on the television when his beautiful nine year old daughter ran into the room, jumped onto his lap and asked:
"Daddy? Who is God?"
"Sweetheart, that will be the subject of tonights sermon, can you wait' till church tonight, listen to what I have to say and then make your own decisions, or would you really like to discuss it now?"
"Yeah--I can wait daddy thanks" and off she ran to play with the dog.
Later at church, all is quite and the minister starts his sermon. Throwing his right arm in the air and shouts: "GOD" and then a little softer voice, and lowering his arm "is neither man---- nor woman" and looks around at the congregation.

All is quite with the exception of a few "Praise the lords" & "Amen brothers." After a slight pause the preacher again throws his right arm in the air and again shouts: more...

On some air bases the Air Force is on one side of the field and civilian aircraft use the other side of the field, with the control tower in the middle.
One day the tower received a call from an aircraft asking, "What time is it?"
The tower responded, "Who is calling?"
The aircraft replied, "What difference does it make?"
The tower replied, "It makes a lot of difference. If it is an American Airlines flight, it is 3 o'clock. If it is an Air Force plane, it is 1500 hours. If it is a Navy aircraft, it is 6 bells. If it is an Army aircraft, the big hand is on the 12 and the little hand is on the 3. If it is a Marine Corps aircraft, it's Thursday afternoon."