Amazon Jokes / Recent Jokes

Three men are traveling in the Amazon: a Canadian, an American, and a Mexican.
They get captured by a fierce tribe of Amazons.
The tribe leader tells them they will be whipped for entering their territory. The tribe chief says to the Candian, "What do you want on your back for your whipping?"
The Canadian responds, "I will take oil!"
So they put oil on his back, and a large Amazon whips him 10 times.
When he is finished the Canadian has these huge welts on his back, and he can hardly move.
The Amazons haul the Canadian away, and say to the Mexican,
"What do you want on your back?"
"I will take nothing!, I will take my punishment like a real man!" says the Mexican, and he boldly stands there and takes his 10 lashings without a single flinch.
Finally, it's the Yank's turn and the tribal chief asks:
"What will you take on your back?"
And he responds - " I'll take the Mexican! "

Knock Knock
Who's there!
Amazon!
Amazon who?
Amazon of a bishop. What's your father do? Knock Knock
Who's there!
Amazon!
Amazon who?
Amazon of a gun!

Three men are traveling in the Amazon: a Canadian, an American, and a Mexican. They get captured by a fierce tribe of Amazons. The tribe leader tells them they will be whipped for entering their territory. The tribe chief says to the Candian, "What do you want on your back for your whipping?" The Canadian responds, "I will take oil!"So they put oil on his back, and a large Amazon whips him 10 times. When he is finished the Canadian has these huge welts on his back, and he can hardly move. The Amazons haul the Canadian away, and say to the Mexican,"What do you want on your back?" "I will take nothing!, I will take my punishment like a real man!" says the Mexican, and he boldly stands there and takes his 10 lashings without a single flinch. Finally, it's the Yank's turn and the tribal chief asks:"What will you take on your back?" And he responds - " I'll take the Mexican! "

Explorer walking in the Amazon Rain Forest comes across a clearing with a dead 60ft Dinosaur and a hunter sat astride it. He asks the hunter "Who killed the Dinosaur?" "I did," replied the hunter. "How did you kill it?" Asked the Explorer. The hunter replied, " With My club" The Explorer was astonished, so he enquired," How big is your club then? The hunter answered, "There are about 400 of us now!"

An explorer in the deepest Amazon suddenly finds himself surrounded by a bloodthirsty group of natives. Upon surveying his situation, he says quietly to
himself, "I'm screwed."
There is a ray of light from the sky and a voice booms out: "No you are NOT screwed. Pick up that stone in front of you and bash the head of the chief."
So the explorer picks up the stone and proceedes to bash in the head of the chief. He is breathing heavily while standing above the lifeless body.
Surrounding him are the 100 native warriors with a look of shock on their faces. The voice booms out again:
"Okay... NOW you're screwed!"