Anand Jokes / Recent Jokes

A tourist guide in Gujarat used to advertise "The Dev Anand guide, the best guide knowing every inch of Gujarat."
An American touring party hired him to see Gujarat.
The guide was hopelessly wandering, changing the directions, and driving the touring party around for a long tie with a tremendous anxiety on his forehead.

The tourist party sensed he was lost. "This is ridiculous," one exasperated tourist said to the Dev Anand guide, "you told us that you were the best tourist guide in the state of Gujarat who knew every inch of land. Wasn't that true?"

"No that is true," Replied Dev Anand, "but you see we are somewhere in Marwar now!"

Anand went to a world-famous "Echo Point" and hollered "Hallobo!" To his surprise, there was no reply. He again shouted "Hellooo!" this time with all his might. Back came a reply "Thank you for shouting. Your shout is important to us. At present all our echoes are busy replying to other shouters. Please hold on. Your shout will be replied to very shortly."

Anand turned up one morning at the office with a big plaster cast stuck across his face.
"What happened?" asked his friend.
"I had an argument with my wife and she beat me up!" replied Anand.
"Beat you up?" his friend exclaimed in shocked tones. "What are you yaar, a man or a mouse?"
"I am a man!" asserted Anand.
"And how do you say that?" asked his friend.
"Because," Anand replied, "my wife is afraid of mice."

Mr. Eric was walking around the form 3 block when he saw one of the form 3 class, 3'T', making noise. He entered the classroom and this is what happened....
Mr. Eric: Who was playing and talking please stand up or the whole class gets it.
Anand: "Will The Real Slim Shady Please Stand Up"(Eminem)
Mr. Eric: You! I want you to come to my office now Office Time: 0900hrs
Mr. Eric: What Is Your name?
Anand: "Say My Name Say My Name"(Destiny's Child)
Mr. Eric: Don't play a fool
Anand: "Can't Believe I'm The Fool Again"(Westlife)
Mr. Eric: Do you want me to beat you?
Anand: "Hit Me Baby One More Time"(Britney Spears)
Mr Eric: What did u say?
Anand: "WHAT!"(Stone Cold)
Mr. Eric: Are you out of your head? Anand: "I Can't Get U Outta My Head"(Kylie Minogue)
Mr. Eric: Who do you think you are?
Anand: "I'm A Genie In Bottle"(Christina Aguilera)
Mr. Eric: more...