Anytime Jokes / Recent Jokes
A man walks into an insurance office and asks for a job. "Sorry, we don't need anyone..." they replied." You can't afford not to hire me. I can sell anyone anything anytime!""Well, we have two prospects that no one has been able to sell. If you can sell just one, then you have a job." He was gone about two hours and returned and handed them two checks, one for $25, 000 and another for $50, 000." How in the world did you do that?" they asked." I told you I'm the worlds best salesman, I can sell anyone anything, anytime!""Did you get a urine sample?" they asked him." What's that?" he asked." Well, if you sell a policy over $20, 000 the company requires a urine sample. Now take these two bottles and go back and get urine samples." He was gone about 8 hours and the office was about to close, when in he walks in with two five gallon buckets, one in each hand. He sets the buckets down and reaches in his shirt more...
A man walks into an insurance office and asks for a job.
"Sorry, we don't need anyone..." they replied.
"You can't afford not to hire me. I can sell anyone anything anytime!"
"Well, we have two prospects that no one has been able to sell. If you can sell just one, then you have a job."
He was gone about two hours and returned and handed them two checks, one for $25,000 and another for $50,000.
"How in the world did you do that?" they asked.
"I told you I'm the worlds best salesman, I can sell anyone anything, anytime!"
"Did you get a urine sample?" they asked him.
"What's that?" he asked.
"Well, if you sell a policy over $20,000 the company requires a urine sample. Now take these two bottles and go back and get urine samples."
He was gone about 8 hours and the office was about to close, when in he walks in with two five gallon buckets, one in each hand. He sets the more...
A man walks into an insurance office and asks for a job. "Sorry, we don't need anyone..." they replied."You can't afford not to hire me. I can sell anyone anything anytime!""Well, we have two prospects that no one has been able to sell. If you can sell just one, then you have a job."He was gone about two hours and returned and handed them two checks, one for $25,000 and another for $50,000."How in the world did you do that?" they asked."I told you I'm the worlds best salesman, I can sell anyone anything, anytime!""Did you get a urine sample?" they asked him."What's that?" he asked."Well, if you sell a policy over $20,000 the company requires a urine sample. Now take these two bottles and go back and get urine samples."He was gone about 8 hours and the office was about to close, when in he walks in with two five gallon buckets, one in each hand. He sets the buckets down and reaches in his shirt pocket and more...
Morris walks into an insurance office and asks for a job. "We don't need anyone," they replied.
"You can't afford not to hire me. I can sell anyone, anytime, anything."
"Well we have two prospects that no one has been able to sell. If you can sell just one, you have a job." He was gone about two hours, and returned and handed them two checks - one for $25,000.00 and another for $50,000.00.
"How in the world did you do that?" they asked.
"I told you I'm the worlds best salesman. I can sell anyone, anywhere, anytime!"
"Did you get a urine sample?" they asked him.
"What's that?" he asked.
"Well, if you sell a policy over $20,000.00 the company requires a urine sample. Take these two bottles and go back and get urine samples."
Morris was gone about six hours and they were fixing to close when in he walks in with two five more...
Here are rules for The Anime Drinking Game, it is suggested that you only use a few at a time (if you value your liver). The general rules are first followed by the one that are series specific. General Rules: Drink once whenever there is a bath/shower scene. Drink once every time a robot combines/transforms etc. Twice if it is accompanied by the "Synthesized Battle Music Theme". Drink once every time a character says an English word or phrase. Finish the bottle if the word is "Darlin". Drink once whenever you see a sign, computer readout etc. in English. Three times if it's not spelled right. Drink once whenever a Hyperdimensional sledgehammer/16 ton weight/. 44 Automag is used to subdue somebody. Drink once if the big giant robot ends up being piloted by somebody other than the person who was supposed to fly it. Drink once when the background goes abstract for dramatic effect. If the action repeats itself X times, drink X times. Drink once when an unexpected wind more...
DID YOU DO THIS AWFUL CRIME? DID YOU DO IT ANYTIME?
I did not do this awful crime. I could not, would not, anytime.
DID YOU TAKE THIS PERSON'S LIFE? DID YOU DO IT WITH A KNIFE?
I did not do it with a knife. I did not, could not, kill my wife. I did not do this awful crime I could not, would not, anytime.
DID YOU LEAVE A POOL OF BLOOD? DID YOU DROP THIS BLOODY GLOVE?
I did not leave a pool of blood. I can not even wear that glove. I did not do it with a knife. I did not, could not, kill my wife. I did not do this awful crime I could not, would not, anytime.
I did not kill Nicole and Ron I did not kill them, Ito-san
Peter walks into an insurance office and asks for a job.
"We don't need anyone" they replied.
"You can't afford not to hire me. I can sell anyone, anytime, anything!"
"Well we have two prospects that No One has been able to sell. If you can sell just one, you have a job."
He was gone about two hours, and returned and handed them two checks, one for $25,000.00 and another for $50,000.00. "How in the world did you do that ?" they asked.
"I told you I'm the worlds best salesman, I can sell anyone, anywhere, anytime!"
"Did you get a urine sample?" they asked him. "What's that?" he asked. "Well, if you sell a policy over $20,000.00 the company requires a urine sample. Take these two bottles and go back and get urine samples."
Peter was gone about 6 hours and they were fixing to close when he walks in with two five gallon buckets, one in each hand.
He sets the buckets down, and more...