Apologizes Jokes / Recent Jokes

Teacher: Wat do u call a person who apologizes if he has committed a mistake ?
Boy: An honest man.
Teacher: Good. And what do u call a person who apologizes even if he has committed no mistake ?
Boy: A Boyfriend.

Chaim escapes from a mental hospital and goes to the train station. He gets on the train and is seated next to a business man. He asks the man, "Are you Jewish?" The man says, "No." Joe apologizes. Ten minutes later, he asks, "You wouldn't happen to be Jewish would you?" The man replies, "No!" Joe immediately apologizes. Five minutes later he says, " Can I ask you a personal question.... are you Jewish?" He shots, "NO!" Joe continueslike this for the next four hours. When the train stops, the man runs away. When he gets to the hotel, he realizes there is someone next to him. It is Joe. Joe asks, Say, are you Jewish?" The man is so fed up that he says, "Yes." Joe says, "That's funny... you don't look Jewish at all!"

A priest was driving along and saw nun on the side of the road.
He Stopped and offered her a lift which she accepted. She got in
and crossed her legs, forcing the habit to open and reveal a leg. The Priest looks and nearly has an accident, and after changing gear lets his hand slide up her leg.
She immediately says "Father remember psalm 129" The priest apologizes Profusely and removes his hand but is unable to remove his eyes from her leg.
Further on when he changes gear and has oggled at her leg for
the Zillionth time he lets the hand slide up the leg again. The Nun once Again says "Father remember psalm 129" Once again the priest apologizes.
"Sorry sister but you know the flesh is weak" Arriving at the convent The nun gets out and the priest goes on his way. Once he
arrives at his Church he rushes to the bible and looks up psalm 129 it said, "GO FORTH AND SEEK, FURTHER UP YOU WILL FIND GLORY" more...

George Washington, Abe Lincoln and Osama are on an airplane.
Washington takes a quarter, drops it out of the plane and says, "This is for my country."
Lincoln takes out a penny and drops it out of the plane and says, "This is for my country."
Osama takes a bomb and drops it out of the plane and says, "This is for my country."
They land and Washington sees a girl crying and he asks her why. She tells him that she was hit in the head with a quarter and then Washington apologizes.
Then Lincoln sees a boy crying and asks him why. He says that he was hit on the head with a penny and Lincoln apologizes.
Then Osama sees a boy cracking up and he asks him why. The boy replies, "Daddy farted and then the house blew up!"

Chaim escapes from a mental hospital and goes to the train station. He gets on the train and is seated next to a business man. He asks the man, "Are you Jewish?" The man says, "No." Joe apologizes. Ten minutes later, he asks, "You wouldn't happen to be Jewish would you?" The man replies, "No!" Joe immediately apologizes. Five minutes later he says, " Can I ask you a personal question....are you Jewish?" He shots, "NO!" Joe continueslike this for the next four hours. When the train stops, the man runs away. When he gets to the hotel, he realizes there is someone next to him. It is Joe. Joe asks, Say, are you Jewish?" The man is so fed up that he says, "Yes." Joe says, "That's funny...you don't look Jewish at all!"