Asset Jokes / Recent Jokes
These are stories from help desks around the country.
At 3: 37 a. m. on a Sunday, I had just looked at the clock to determine my annoyance level, when I received a frantic phone call from a new user of a Macintosh Plus. She had gotten her entire family out of the house and was calling from her neighbor's. She had just received her first system error and interpreted the picture of the bomb on the screen as a warning that the computer was going to blow up.
----------------------------------------
Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer: "Ok."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
Customer: "Sure, you told me to write' click' and I more...
ENGLISH FILIPINO TRANSLATION Asset - Ari Fixed Asset - Aring Nakatirik Liquid Asset - Aring Tumutulo Written-off Asset - Aring Pinutol Cut-off time - Oras ng Pagputol Depreciation - Pagkalaspag ng Ari Fully Depreciated Asset - Aring Laspag na Laspag na Earning Asset - Aring Ganado Pa Non-Earning Asset - Aring Baldado na Owned Asset - Sariling Ari Other Asset - Ari ng Iba Miscellaneous Asset - Mga Aring Pinagsamasama Erroneous Entry - Mali ang Pagkapasok Double Entry - Dalawa ang Pinasukan Multiple Entry - Labas-pasok Correcting Entry - Itinama ang Pagpasok Reversing Entry - Baligtad ang Pasok Tangible Asset - Aring Nasasalat Dispensed - Nilabasan Undispensed - Hindi Nilabasan
An auditor was examining the balance sheet of a mining company that had just bought a sheep station in the Pilbara area of Western Australia. The reason for the purchase was partly for the thousands of acres that the station covered and partly for the thousands of sheep that ranged over those thousands of acres. The auditor, being very diligent, noted that the value of the sheep formed a significant asset and, like all good auditors, knew that he would have to verify that asset. He chartered an aircraft and flew up to the station. The manager was at the airstrip to meet him."Hello," he said. "Im the auditor. Ive come to count the sheep."