Attitude Jokes / Recent Jokes

A guy named David received a parrot for his birthday. The parrot was fully grown, with a bad attitude and worse vocabulary. Every other word was an expletive. Those that weren't expletives were, to say the least, rude. David tried hard to change the bird's attitude and was constantly saying polite words, playing soft music, anything he could think of to try and set a good example.

Nothing worked. He yelled at the bird and the bird yelled back. He shook the bird and the bird just got more angry and more rude. Finally, in a moment of desperation, David put the parrot in the freezer.

For a few moments he heard the bird squawk and kick and scream. Then suddenly there was quiet. Not a sound for half a minute.

David was frightened that he might have hurt the bird and quickly opened the freezer door. The parrot calmly stepped out onto David's extended arm and said, "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I will endeavor at more...

If you can sell yourself, you can sell anything" said the celebrated Shah Rukh Khan, in one of his countless interviews. "So true!" said I, "and that’s what I can’t do!" thank God I’ll never be in a marketing job.
But the opportunity presented itself, and I, decided to take the challenge. In February 2007, I took up my new job as a one person department of Corporate Relations (my papers said Asst Mgr Corp Rel), and took my first posting in a developing (with a bolding), prosperous but disorganized, second tire town in north Karnataka.
And this is what I discovered.
Sure, some people have the gift of the gab. And sure, it helps in striking first contacts. Also, a social person with extrovert attitude will enjoy marketing, as his job is to do what he loves most.
However, marketing is not the job of the smart or the charming; it is the job of the purposeful.
Introverted attitude is that in which the energy flow is inward, and the more...

Jimmy received a parrot for Christmas. The parrot was fully grown, with a very bad attitude and a worse vocabulary. Every other word was an expletive; those that weren't expletives were, to say the least, rude.
Jimmy tried to change the bird's attitude by constantly saying polite words, playing soft music... anything he could think of.
Nothing worked. He yelled at the bird, and the bird got worse. He shook the bird, and the bird got madder and more rude.
Finally, in a moment of desperation, Jimmy put the parrot in the freezer. For a few moments he heard the bird swearing, squawking kicking and screaming and then, suddenly, there was absolute quiet. Jimmy was frightened that he might have actually hurt the bird, and quickly opened the freezer door.
The parrot calmly stepped out onto Jimmy's extended arm and said, "I'm sorry that I offended you with my language and my actions, and I ask your forgiveness. I will endeavor to correct my behavior".
Jimmy was more...