Avid Jokes / Recent Jokes

An avid golfer has been dating a lady who works at a house of ill repute (he doesn't know that). They get pretty serious and the golfer wants to propose. "Ginger, darling." he says. "I want to marry you. But I must confess something about myself. I am an avid golfer and golf all the time." Ginger smiles, for she is in love with the man as well. "That's okay. I don't mind. But I think I should tell you something about myself. I'm a hooker." "Oh, I'm sure if I take you out on the course I'll help your problem."

A young man, who was also an avid golfer, found himself with a few hours to spare one afternoon. He figured if he hurried and played very fast, he could get in 9 holes before he had to head home. Just as he was about to tee off, an old gentleman shuffled onto the tee and asked if he could accompany the young man as he was golfing alone. Not being able to say no, he allowed the old man to join him.

To his surprise, the old man played fairly quickly. He didn't hit the ball far, but plodded along consistently and didn't waste much time.

Finally, they reached the 9th fairway and the young man found himself with a tough shot. There was a large pine tree right in front of his ball and directly between his ball and the green.

After several minutes of debating how to hit the shot, the old man finally said, "You know, when I was your age, I'd hit the ball right over that tree."

With that challenge placed before him, the youngster swung more...

Dave, an avid golfer, had been dating a woman for quite some time. Unbeknownst to him, she worked at a house of ill repute. As time went on, they began to feel serious about each other.
"Candy, sweetheart, I want to marry you," Dave said. "First though, there is something I must confess. I am an avid golfer and golf all the time."
With love in her eyes, Candy looked at Dave and replied, "That's ok, darling, I don't mind. I too have something I must confess about myself . I'm a hooker."
"No problem," Dave replied. "I'm sure if I take you out on the course I'll be able to help with your problem."

An avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog. His search ended when he found a dog that could actually walk on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure none of his friends would ever believe him. He decided to try to break the news to a friend of his, the eternal pessimist who refused to be impressed with anything. This, surely, would impress him. He invited him to hunt with him and his new dog. As they waited by the shore, a flock of ducks flew by. they fired, and a duck fell. The dog responded and jumped into the water. The dog, however, did not sink but instead walked across the water to retrieve the bird, never getting more than his paws wet. This continued all day long; each time a duck fell, the dog walked across the surface of the water to retrieve it. The pessimist watched carefully, saw everything, but did not say a single word. On the drive home the hunter asked his friend, "Did you notice anything unusual about my new dog?" "I more...

What lives in apples and is an avid reader? A bookworm!