Baboon Jokes

The railways are always looking for ways to cut labor costs. Years ago there used to be five crew members on a train. Then they went to four, then three, and now many freight train crews are made up of two people, the engineman and the brakeman.
They finally figured out a way to eliminate one more crewman, and many were surprised to find out that they were eliminating the engineman. They replaced him with a baboon who had been sent to school for just one day. Most engineers study for years before they can qualify for the job.
On the first trip the brakeman was a bit leery, but thought he'd give it a try. They outfitted the cab of the engine with two color monitors, one in front of the baboon, and one in front of the brakeman.
While in the yard, the brakeman heard the carman on the radio call for the brakes to be setup for the brake test. The screen in front of the baboon flashed the message "SETUP BRAKES" and the baboon did.
Next, the carman called for the more...

A woman on an African safari strays from the group and is grabbed by a baboon and raped. Rescued, she is rushed back to the States, where it takes her nearly a month to come out of the shock.
A friend visits. "Don't you think it would help to talk about it?", she asks.
"What's to say?" the woman sighs sadly. "It's been four weeks - he doesn't call, he doesn't write..."

Hey, what are you going to do for a face when the baboon wants its ass back?

Nature has many laws that hold fast and true.
For example, a baby ape will always grow-up to be an ape; likewise, a baby baboon will become an adult baboon.
A baby pig will mature into a full grown pig.
A baby jackass will always become a jackass.
A puppy quickly matures into a dog;
a mongrel pup develops into a cur.
Yet oddly enough, women say a young man may grow-up to be any one of these.

Nature has many laws that hold fast and true.

For example, a baby ape will always grow-up to be an ape; likewise, a baby baboon will become an adult baboon.

A baby pig will mature into a full grown pig.

A baby jackass will always become a jackass.

Yet oddly enough, women say a young man may grow-up to be any one of these.