Banker Jokes / Recent Jokes
An inventor goes into a bank and asks the Banker for a loan to help him maufacture a new product. The Banker tells him he needs to see the product, first.
The man pulls a small envelope out of his pocket and empties the contents, an orange powder, onto the desk. "That's my invention!" "You dump this onto a womans pussy and it makes it taste like ORANGES! FRESH SQUEEZED ORANGES! He shouts.
The banker is not impressed. He says, "That's obscene, I won't loan the banks money on something like that! GET OUT!
The inventor leaves, but the next week he's back and makes a $5,000 deposit. The next day he deposits $10,000. The thrid day it's $20,000. The banker sees this and apologizes to the man.
The inventor tells him, "No, you where right! I was wrong. You straightened me out. I've come up with someting much better and I owe it all to you! That's why I using your bank!"
The banker asks what his new invention is. The guy smiles and pulls out more...
Here's one about the old native American who wanted a loan for $500. The banker pulled out the loan application, "What are you going to do with the money?" "Take jewlery to city and sell it," was the response. "What have you got for collateral?" "Don't know collateral." "Well that's something of value that would cover the cost of the loan.Have you got any vehicles?" "Yes, 1949 Chevy pickup." The banker shook his head, "How about livestock?" "Yes, I have a horse." "How old is it?" "Don't know, has no teeth." Finally the banker decided to make the $500 loan. Several weeks later the old man was back in the bank. He pulled out a roll of bills, "Here to pay." he said. He then handed the banker the money to pay his loan off."What are you going to do with the rest of that money?" "Put in teepee." "Why don't you deposit it in my bank," he asked. more...
An old Native American wanted a loan for $500. He approached his local banker. The banker pulled out the loan application, asking, "What are you going to do with the money?" "Take jewelry to city and sell it," said the old man. "What have you got for collateral?" queried the banker, going strictly by the book. "Don't know of collateral." "Well that's something of value that would cover the cost of the loan. Have you got any vehicles?" "Yes, I have a 1949 Chevy pickup." The banker shook his head, "How about livestock?" "Yes, I have a horse." "How old is it?" "I don't know; it has no teeth." Finally the banker decided to make the $500 loan. Several weeks later the old man was back in the bank. He pulled out a roll of bills, "Here's the money to pay loan," he said, handing the entire amount including interest. "What are you going to do with the rest of that money?" more...
An old Native American wanted a loan of $500. He approached his local banker. The banker pulled out the loan application, asking, "What are you going to do with the money?"
"Take jewelry to city and sell it," said the old man.
"What have you got for collateral?" queried the banker, going strictly by the book.
"Don't know of collateral."
"Well, that's something of value that would cover the cost of the loan. Have you got any vehicles?"
"Yes, I have a 1949 Chevy pickup."
The banker shook his head, "How about livestock?"
"Yes, I have a horse."
"How old is it?"
"I don't know; it has no teeth."
Finally the banker decided to make the $500 loan.
Several weeks later the old man was back in the bank. He pulled out a roll of bills, "Here's the money to pay loan," he said, handing the entire amount including interest.
"What are you more...
A Brooklyn lawyer, a used car salesman and a banker were gathered by a coffin containing the body of an old friend.
In his grief, one of the three said, "In my family, we have a custom of giving the dead some money, so they'll have something to pay tax's over there."
They all agreed that this was appropriate.
The banker dropped a hundred dollar bill into the casket and walked away in tears.
The car salesman did the same.
The lawyer looked around and seeing no one was near the coffin, he took out the bills and wrote a check for $300.
A Brooklyn lawyer, a used car salesman and a banker were gathered by a coffin containing the body of an old friend. In his grief, one of the three said, "In my family, we have a custom of giving the dead some money, so they? ll have something to spend over there."They all agreed that this was appropriate. The banker dropped a hundred dollar bill into the casket, and the car salesman did the same. The lawyer took out the bills and wrote a check for $300.
A Brooklyn lawyer, a used car salesman and a banker were gathered by a coffin containing the body of an old friend. In his grief, one of the three said, "In my family, we have a custom of giving the dead some money, so they'll have something to spend over there."
They all agreed that this was appropriate. The banker dropped a hundred dollar bill into the casket, and the car salesman did the same. The lawyer took out the bills and wrote a check for $300.