Bean Jokes / Recent Jokes

There was a Colombian, a Mexican and an American on a boat. The Mexican sees the Colombian throw a coffee bean overboard as he walks by. "Why'de you throw the coffee bean over?" asks the Mexican.
"Because we have too many in our country". So the Mexican throws a Taco overboard. Seeing this the American asks "why did you throw that Taco overboard?".
The Mexican Replies "because we have too many in our country".
So the American picks the Mexican up and throws him overboard...

Why did the elephant wear multi-color tennis shoes? So he could hide in the jelly bean jar.

If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, she'd be Yoko Ono Bono. If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she'd be Dolly Dali. If Bo Derek married Don Ho, she'd be Bo Ho. If Oprah Winfrey married Depak Chopra, she'd be Oprah Chopra. If Cat Stevens married Snoop Doggy Dogg, hey! it's the' 90's!, he'd beCat Doggy Dogg. If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry Elton John, she'd be Olivia Newton-John Newton John. If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry Herman Munster, she'd become Sondra Locke Ness Munster. If Bea Arthur married Sting, she'd be Bea Sting. If Liv Ullman married Judge Lance Ito, then divorced him and married Jerry Mathers, she'd be Liv Ito Beaver. If Snoop Doggy Dogg married Winnie the Pooh, he'd be Snoop Doggy DoggPooh. How about a baseball marriage? If Boog Powell married Felipe Alou, he'd be Boog Alou. If G. Gordon Liddy married Boutros-Boutros Ghali, then divorced him tomarry Kenny G., he'd be G. Ghali G. Nog (Quark's brother more...

there were three beans..
a black bean a red bean and a yellow bean
the black bean lived in the toilet the yellow bean lived in the freezer and the red bean lived in the cupboard.
one night they all decide to change there sleeping arrangements, so the black bean goes and sleeps in the freezer, the yellow bean goes and sleeps in the cupboard and the red bean goes and sleeps in the toilet.
in the morning they all wake up and meet in the kitchen to exchange stories.
the black bean goes " i hardly got any sleep last ngiht because it was so cold! "
the yellow bean then goes " i love the cupboard it was so cosy and warm! "
then the red bean goes " it was raining last ngiht but at least a log came and saved me " .

The guest was a bit surprised when his host served him a dinner of nothing but a dish of bean curd The host praised the virtues of bean curd, saying, "Bean curd is my life; it's the most delicious food in the world." One day, he had the chance to visit his friend, who remembered that the man loved bean curd and so he served fish and meat with bean curd However, the man devoured only the fish and meat, and didn't touch the bean curd His friend asked, "You say bean curd is your life, but why don't you eat it today?" The man answered, "I guess when I see fish and meat on my plate, I don't want my life anymore."

Knock Knock
Who's there!
Bean!
Bean who?
Bean working very hard today! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Bean!
Bean who?
Bean to any movies lately? Knock Knock
Who's there!
Bean!
Bean who?
Bean fishing lately?

Knock Knock
Who's there!
Jelly Bean!
Jeffy Bean?
Jelly Bean to the city yet!