Bike Jokes / Recent Jokes

A
City cop was on his horse waiting to cross the street
when a little girl on her new shiny bike stopped beside
him. "Nice bike," the cop said "did Santa
bring it to you?" "Yep," the little girl
said, "he sure did!" The cop looked the bike
over and handed the girl a $5 ticket for a safety violation.The
cop said, "Next year tell Santa to put a reflector
light on the back of it." The young girl looked
up at the cop and said, "Nice horse you got there
sir, did Santa bring it to you?" "Yes, he
sure did," chuckled the cop. The little girl looked
up at the cop and said, "Next year tell Santa the
dick goes underneath the horse, not on top."

Two engineering students were walking across campus when one said, "Where did
you get such a great bike?" The second engineer replied,"Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful
woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her
clothes and said, "Take what you want.""The second engineer nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes
probably wouldn't have fit."

Little Johnny goes home one day and says, "Mommy, I had sex with a teacher today."
His mother says, "OK you should go tell your daddy."
So he goes and tells his father. His father says, "I am so proud of you I am going to go buy a new bike."
Johnny and his father go and pick out this beautiful top-of-the-line bike.
His father says, "Johnny, why don't you ride your bike home?"
Johnny says, "I cant. My butt hurts too bad."

there was this tree and a bear and rabit the bear was running after the rabbit well there
was a genny liveing in this tree and it came out and said i well give you each three wishis
they said ok .the bear said for my frist wish
i wish for all the bears in the part of the woods to be female poof they were well the rabitt said i wish for a drit bike poof he got
it and the bear said your the dumest rabbit i ever mett the rabbit said yeah i know the bear said i wish for all the bear in the contry to be female poof they were then the rabbit said i wish for a dirt bike helmet
poof he got it the bear said i wish for alll
the bear in the world to be female poof they were that was all his wish the rabbit said for my last wish i wish for that bear right there to be gay poof he was gay than gay

Why did the kid fall off his bike?
Because someone threw a fridge at him.

It's the day after Christmas and young Johnny rides his new bike up to a stop light where a policeman on his horse is waiting for the light to change. The policeman looks over at Johnny and says, "Got that bike for Christmas, sonny?" The youngster responds, proudly, "Ya, Santa brought it for me." The policeman then proceeds to write the young fellow a bicyle violation ticket for not having a reflector on the back bumper and hands it to him saying, "Well, next time you better tell him to put a light on it." Johnny looks at the citation, looks back up at the cop and says, "And did Santa bring you that horse?" Humouring the youngster, the policeman answers, "Why, yes, he did." To which Johnny responds, "Well, next time you better tell him to put the dick underneath the horse, not on top."

A couple of weeks before Christmas, a little boy decided to write a letter to Santa. As he started, "Dear Santa... " he thought, "No, I'll go to a higher authority," and decided to direct his letter to Jesus instead.
"Dear Jesus,
If you get me a bike for Christmas, I will be good for two weeks."
"No, no, no! I know I can't be good for two weeks," he thought to himself.
So, he started his letter all over again...
"Dear Jesus,
If you get me a bike for Christmas, I will be good for one week."
"No, no, no! I know I can't be good for one week either," he thought to himself.
He quickly ran to the den, grabbed their small statue of Mary, and wrapped it up in a blanket.
Once more, he began his letter...
"Dear Jesus,
I have your mother... if you ever want to see her again... get me a bike for Christmas!"