Bike Jokes / Recent Jokes
Little Johnny's riding his bike around the Catholic school yard, when one of the nuns asks "have you a license to ride in the school little Johnny?"
Johnny takes out a slip of paper which the nun reads.
"That's fine, me boy" she says and off he goes.
Next break, another nun asks the same and little Johnny shows his license once more. Later in the day Johnny rides by the bike shed, under which is sat a priest with his knob in his hand.
"Can you come over here for a few minutes please, little Johnny?"
"Oh no" thinks Johnny, "NOT THE BREATHERLYSER AGAIN!!!"
There was a boy riding on his bike outside a church.
The priest saw him and told him to come into the church and the boy said,"...But they'll steal my bike."
The priest explained how the Holy Spirit would take care of it, so they went inside.
The priest showed the boy how to make the sign of the cross and told the boy to repeat it..."In the name of the Father, The Son...Amen"
The priest said,"What about the Holy Spirit?"
The boy replied, "Its outside taking care of my bike!"
There was a boy riding on his bike outside a church.The priest saw him and told him to come into the church and the boy said,"...But they'll steal my bike."The priest explained how the Holy Spirit would take care of it, so they went inside.The priest showed the boy how to make the sign of the cross and told the boy to repeat it..."In the name of the Father, The Son...Amen"The priest said,"What about the Holy Spirit?"The boy replied, "Its outside taking care of my bike!"
1. Mountain bikes don't screw around.
2. Mountain bikes don't care if it's that time of the month.
3. Mountain bikes don't have parents.
4. Mountain bikes don't whine unless something is really wrong.
5. Mountain bikes don't care about professional sports.
6. You can share your mountain bike with your friends.
7. Mountain bikes don't care how many other mountain bikes you've ridden.
8. When riding, you and your mountain bike can arrive at the same
time.
9. Mountain bikes don't care if other mountain bikes look at
you.
10. Mountain bikes don't care if you look at other mountain
bikes.
11. If your mountain bike goes flat you can fix it.
12. If your mountain bike is too short you can heighten it.
13. If your mountain bike is misaligned, you don't have
to discuss politics with it.
14. You can have a black & white mountain bike and bring it home
to your parents.
15. You don't have to be jealous of other women who more...
A preacher was making his rounds to his parishioners on a bicycle, when he came upon little johnny trying to sell a lawn mower. "How much do you want for the mower?" asked the preacher. "I just want enough money to go out and buy me a bicycle", said little johnny. After a moment of consideration, the preacher asked, "Will you take my bike in trade for it?" Little Johnny asked if he could try it out first, and after riding the bike around a little while said, "Mister, you've got yourself a deal." The preacher took the mower and began to try to crank it. He pulled on the string a few times with no response from the mower. The preacher called the little boy over and said, "I can't get this mower to start." Little Johnny said, "That's because you have to curse at it to get it started." The preacher said, "I've been a minister for twenty-five years. I don't even remember how to curse." Little Johnny looked at him happily more...
1. Mountain bikes don't screw around.
2. Mountain bikes don't care if it's that time of the month.
3. Mountain bikes don't have parents.
4. Mountain bikes don't whine unless something is really wrong.
5. Mountain bikes don't care about professional sports.
6. You can share your mountain bike with your friends.
7. Mountain bikes don't care how many other mountain bikes you've ridden.
8. When riding, you and your mountain bike can arrive at the same time.
9. Mountain bikes don't care if other mountain bikes look at you.
10. Mountain bikes don't care if you look at other mountain bikes.
11. If your mountain bike goes flat you can fix it.
12. If your mountain bike is too short you can heighten it.
13. If your mountain bike is misaligned, you don't have to discuss politics with it.
14. You can have a black & white mountain bike and bring it home to your parents.
15. You don't have to be jealous of other women who covet your mountain more...
On Christmas morning a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light, and next to him is a kid on his brand new bike. The cop says to the kid, "Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" The kid says, "Yeah." The cop says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put a tail-light on that bike." The cop then proceeds to issue the kid a $20.00 bicycle safety violation ticket. The kid takes the ticket and before the cop rides off says, "By the way, that's a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" Humouring the kid, the cop says, "Yeah, he sure did." The kid says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put the dick underneath the horse, instead of on top."