Biker Jokes / Recent Jokes
One day, a truck driver who had been on the road for hours on end, decided to stop at a diner and have some lunch. So he goes into the diner, famished. He walks up to the counter and sits down.
"Waiter, can I have a big juicy steak and a loaded baked potato?
"Sure." says the waiter.
About 15 or 20 minutes later, the guy gets his food. About that time, a biker gang comes into the diner. They walk straight to the guy. The leader says "That's a mighty good looking steak you got there."
"Yes, it is." says the man.
"Mind letting me have it?" says the biker guy.
The truck driver doesn't even respond. He just gets up and walks off.
Biker says to the waiter, "He didn't have much of a backbone did he?"
The waiter says, "Nope. And he's not a good driver either, he just knocked over 10 motorcycles!"
A very timid little man ventured into a biker bar in the Bronx and clearing his throat asked, "... ah, err, which of you gentlemen owns the Doberman tied outside to the parking meter?"
A giant of a man, wearing biker leathers, his body hair growing out through the seams, turned slowly on his stool, looked down at the quivering little man and said, "It's my dog. Why?"
"Well," squeaked the little man, obviously very nervous, "I believe my dog just killed it, sir."
"What?" roared the big man in disbelief. "What in hell kind of dog do you have?"
"Sir," answered the little man, "It's a four week old puppy."
"Liar!" roared the biker, "How could your puppy kill my Doberman?"
"It appears that he choked on it, sir."
Well, there was this truck driver that had been driving all day and hadn't stopped for lunch or anything and he was getting REAL hungry. He sees this diner and pulls in, walks up to the counter and sits down by this old biker who was staring at a steaming bowl of chili.
The waitress comes up and asks the trucker what he'll have and he looks at that chili and says, "Lady, I am starving to die, here, that chili looks good, I'll have that."
The waitress goes off and comes back with the trucker's steamy bowl of chili that he promptly gulps down. Not satisfied yet, he looks over at the biker who is still staring at his chili. The trucker tells him, "hey, I'm still kind of hungry, if you're not gonna eat that, may I?" and the biker slides the bowl of chili toward the trucker.
Well, the trucker takes his time with this bowl. He gets about half way down and there's this big greasy dog turd in the bowl. The trucker proceeds to barf everything back into the bowl more...
Well, there was this truck driver that had been driving all day and hadn't stopped for lunch or anything and he was getting REAL hungry. He sees this diner and pulls in, walks up to the counter and sits down by this old biker who was staring at a steaming bowl of chili.The waitress comes up and asks the trucker what he'll have and he looks at that chili and says, "Lady, I am starving to die, here, that chili looks good, I'll have that."The waitress goes off and comes back with the trucker's steamy bowl of chili that he promptly gulps down. Not satisfied yet, he looks over at the biker who is still staring at his chili. The trucker tells him, "hey, I'm still kind of hungry, if you're not gonna eat that, may I?" and the biker slides the bowl of chili toward the trucker.Well, the trucker takes his time with this bowl. He gets about half way down and there's this big greasy dog turd in the bowl. The trucker proceeds to barf everything back into the bowl and the biker more...
There were three men drinking at Pete's Bar
A Doctor, an Attorney, and a Biker.
As the doctor was drinking his white wine he said "For Valentine's Day I'm going to buy my wife a fur coat and a diamond ring. This way if she doesn't like the fur coat, she will still love me because she got a diamond ring."
As the attorney was drinking his martini he said "For Valentine's Day I'm going to buy my wife a designer dress and a gold bracelet. This way if she doesn't like the dress she will still love me because she got the gold bracelet."
As the biker was drinking his shots of whiskey he said "For Valentine's Day I'm going to buy my wife a T-shirt and a vibrator. This way if she doesn't like the T-shirt she can go f **** herself!"
A man riding his Harley was riding along a California beach, when
suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the
Lord said, "Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I
will grant you one wish."
The biker pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride
over anytime I want."
The Lord said, "Your request is materialistic! Think of the enormous
challenges for that kind of undertaking; the supports required reaching
the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it would take! It
will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is
hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things.
Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help
mankind."
The biker thought about it for a long time.
Finally, he said, "Lord, I wish that I and all men could understand
women; I want to know how she more...
Tired of the boring "straights" she'd been laying, a gal decided she'd find out if bikers were really the heavy "cocksmen" that she heard they were.
So she picked up a gigantic biker and went with him up to his pad. Stripped and ready, anxiously awaiting some real action, she was astonished to see that his fully erect dick was only two inches long.
"Who," she demanded scornfully, "do you think you're gonna satisfy with that?"
Grinning confidently, the biker replied, " Me!"