Biker Jokes / Recent Jokes
A highly timid little man, ventured into a biker barin the Bronx and clearing his throat asked, "Um, err, which of you gentlemen owns the Doberman tied outsideto the parking meter?" A giant of a man, wearing biker leathers, his bodyhair growing out through the seams, turned slowly onhis stool, looked down at the quivering little manand said, "It's my dog. Why?" "Well," squeaked the little man, obviously very nervous,"I believe my dog just killed it, sir." "What?" roared the big man in disbelief. "What in thehell kind of dog do you have?" "Sir," answered the little man, "It's a four week oldpuppy." "Bull!" roared the biker, "How could your puppy kill myDoberman?" "It appears that he choked on it, sir."
A cowboy and a biker are on death row, and are to be executed on the same day. The day comes, and they are brought to the gas chamber. The warden asks the cowboy if he has a last request, to which the cowboy replies, "Ah shore do, wardn. Ah`d be mighty grateful if`n yoo`d play `Achy Breaky Heart` fur me bahfore ah hafta go."
"Sure enough, cowboy, we can do that," says the warden. He turns to the biker, "And you, biker, what`s your last request?"
"That you kill me first."
A little old lady wanted to join a motorcycle gang. She knocked on the door of the local biker club and a big, hairy, bearded guy with tattoos all over his arms answers the door.
"I want to join your biker club," she proclaims.
The amused biker told her that she needed to meet certain requirements before she was allowed to join. First he asks, "You have a bike?"
"Yeah," the little old lady says, pointing to a Harley parked in the driveway. "That's my Harley over there."
"Hmmm," the biker replies. "Do you smoke?"
"Yeah, I smoke," says the little old gal. "I smoke 4 packs of cigarettes a day and a couple of cigars while I'm shooting pool." The biker is impressed and asks, "Well, have you ever been picked up by the Fuzz?"
The little old lady thinks for a moment, then she says, "No,never been picked up by the fuzz. But I have been more...
An old man was eating in a truck stop when three rough-looking bikers walked in. As they passed the old man, the first biker pushed his cigarette into the old man's pie, then laughed and took a seat at the counter. The second biker picked up the old man's milk and spit into it. The third biker turned over the old man's plate before joining the others at the counter.Without saying a word to the laughing bikers, the old man put his money down, got up, and left the diner. One of the bikers said to the waitress, "Not much of a man, was he?"The waitress replied," Not much of a truck driver either. He just backed his big rig over three motorcycles!"
A biker was riding along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish."
The biker pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want."
The Lord said, "Your request is materialistic, think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that would honor and glorify me."
The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand my wife. I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, more...
A man walks into a bar one day and asks, "Does anyone here own that rottweiler outside?""Yeah, I do!" a biker says, standing up. "What about it?""Well, I think my chihuahua just killed him...""What are you talkin' about?!" the biker says, disbelievingly. "How could your little runt kill my rottweiler?""Well, it seems he got stuck in your dog's throat!"
A man walks into a bar one day and asks, "Does anyone here own that rottweiler outside?" "Yeah, I do!" a biker says, standing up. "What about it?" "Well, I think my chihuahua just killed him...""What are you talkin' about?!" the biker says, disbelievingly. "How could your little runt kill my rottweiler?" "Well, it seems he got stuck in your dog's throat!"