Bitch Jokes

One day a little boy over heard his parents in the bedrooom arguing,"You bitch, your cunt is too hairy! Whell your dick is to small bastard!"The boy was curious about these new words so he went in the room and asked what they meant. The startled parents did their best to get out of the situation, "You see son, bitch and bastard are what adults call each other sometimes and dick and cunt is a nickname we gave our coats." The boyshrugged his shoulders and went off to play. Later that day the boy was watching his dad shave. Suddenly his dad blurted out, "Shit" when he cuthimself. The boy asked, "dad what does that mean?" and his dad cleverly replied, "That's the brand of shaving cream I'm using." So the boy wandered into the kitchen where his mom was preparing a turkey for company that evening. As he was watching, his mom burned herself on the stove and blurted out "Fuck". Again the boy asked the meaning and the frustrated more...

A little boy heard his mom and dad fightin and the mom called the dad a bastard and he called her a bitch so the boy asks whats a bitch and whats a bastard? The parents said well, a bitch is a girl and a bastard is a boy. So the little boy then hears the neighbor say to his wife, im gonna stick my dick in your pussy and the boy again asks his parents what a pussy and a dick are. the parents say, well, a dick is a hat and a pussy is a coat. So the boy goes on and then his dad is shaving and he cuts himself and says Shit. So the boy asks, whats shit dad? and the father says its a type of shaving cream. Then he is downstairs and the mother is cuttin the turkey and she cuts herself and says Fuck. the boy asks mom what does fuck mean? and she says its a way of cuttin turkey. Then all the family and friends come over for thanksgiving and the boy answers the door and says," hey all you bitches and bastards! Please hand me your pussies and dicks and wait in the living room. my parents more...

One day a girl went to church to make a confession
GIRL: Forgive me father for I have sined
PRIEST: What have you done my child
GIRL: I called a man a son of a bitch
PRIEST: Why did you call him a son of a bitch
GIRL: Caused he touched my hand
PRIEST: Like this, (as he touches her hand)
GIRL:Yes father.
PRIEST: That's no reason to call a man a son of a bitch
GIRL: Then he touched my breast.
PRIEST: Like this, (as he touched her breast)
GIRL: Yes father
PRIEST: That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch
GIRL: Then he took off my clothes father
PRIEST: Like this, (as he takes off her clothes)
GIRL: Yes father
PRIEST: That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch
GIRL: Then he stuck his you know what into my you know where
PRIEST: Like this, (as he stuck his you know what into her you know here)
GIRL: YES FATHER, YES FATHER, YES FATHER
PRIEST: (after a few minutes) that's no reason to call him a son of a more...

- Wave properly you stupid bitch!
- Nan please, that's the Queen

What is the difference between a Slut and a Bitch? A Slut sleeps with everyone, a bitch sleeps with everyone but you!