Blow Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q: How do you change a blonde’s mind?
A: Blow in her ear. A2: Buy her another beer.

Q: What's so good about an Ethiopian blowjob? A: You know she'll swallow. Q: Why don't they teach driver's education and sex education on the same day in Iraq? A: They don't want to wear out the camel. Q: What's the difference between a Catholic wife and a Jewish wife? A: A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewelry. Q: What do you get if you cross a Hell's Angel with a Jehovah's Witness? A: Some one who knocks on your door on a Sunday morning and tells YOU to fuck off! Q: Do you know why women fake orgasm? A: Because men fake foreplay. Q: What's the difference between getting a divorce and getting circumcised? A: When you get a divorce, you get rid of the whole prick! Q: A woman of 35 thinks of having children. What does a man of 35 think of? A: Dating children. Q: What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golfball? A: A guy will actually search for a golfball. Q: Why does a bride smile when she walks up the aisle? A: She knows she's given her last blow job. Q: Who is the more...

One day after school Jonathan went to the pet shop and told the owner he wanted to buy a watchdog for his mother's birthday.

"How about this one?" said the salesman, pointing to a cage with a scrawny little poodle in it.

"Are you kidding?" said Jonathan. "That dog looks harmless."

"Yes, but he knows karate," said the salesman. "Watch." The salesman pointed to a huge cinder block and shouted "karate the block!"

Immediately, the poodle struck out its paw and with one blow smashed the block into two pieces.

Next, the salesman pointed to a metal chair, then commanded, "Karate the chair!"

Once again, the little poodle crushed the chair with a single blow.

That night Jonathan brought home the poodle and showed it to his father.

"What kind of watchdog is that to give your mother?" said Jonathan's father. "What good is more...

A blonde was driving home after work, and got caught in a really bad hailstorm.
Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it to a repair shop.
The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he decided to have some fun.
He told her to just go home and blow into the tailpipe really hard,
and all the dents would pop out.
So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands and knees and started blowing into her car's tailpipe. Nothing happened.
She blew a little harder, and still nothing happened. Her roommate, another blonde, came home and said, "What are you doing?"
The first blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow into the tailpipe in order to get the dents to pop out.
Her roommate rolled her eyes and said,
..."HELLLLOOOO!!! You need to roll up the windows."

This quiz has been around for ages. Remember the answers?

1. If a plane crashed on the border of the USA and Canada, where should the survivors be buried?

2. How many species of each animal did Moses take aboard the ark?

3. How many months have 28 days?

4. How far can a bear walk into the woods?

5. What is the value of coin dated 24 B.C.?

6. How many grooves does a 45rpm phonograph record have?

7. A camper leaves her camp, hikes 1 mile south, then 1 mile east where she sees a bear. Then she hikes 1 mile north to arrive at her camp. What color is the bear?

8. If a rooster lays an egg on the peak of a roof, will the egg roll to the left side or to the right side?

9. If a south bound electric train is traveling at a rate of 66 miles per hour and the wind is blowing to the north at 35 miles per hour, which way will the smoke blow?

10. On which side of a chicken are the most more...

A guy leaves his place at the bar to go have a piss. He comes back about10 Minutes later, sits down at the bar, muttering & swearing very softly. The barkeep approaches the customer and asks what the problem is."Oh some son-uv-a-bitch snuck up behind me while I was at the urinal andput a gun to my head"."Jesus Christ! What happened?""He told me to give him a blow job or he'd blow my brains out!""Yeah, then what?""Well you didn't hear a gun shot, did you?"

THIS JOKE IS FROM GOOD WILL HUNTING.. HERE IT GOES THERE A MARRIED COUPLE LYING IN BED AND THEY HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOREVER sO THE WIFE SAYS TO HER HUSBAND BABY WE'VE BEEN MARRIED FOR SO LONG AND I JUST LOVE TO PLEASE U IS THERE ANYTHING I CAN DO FORU NAME ANYTHING AND I'LL DO IT. . SO THE HUSBAND SAYS ANYTHING WIFE SAYS YES ANYTHING
SO HE SAYS WHAT I REALLY WANT IS A BLOW JOB. .. SO SHE GIVES HIM A BLOW JOB. . WHEN THERE DONE THE HUSBAND SAYS THAT WAS GREAT IS THERE I CAN DO FOR U. . AND THE WIFE SAYS WITH A MOUTH FULL OF SPERM U CAN HELP ME CLEAN MY DENTURES