Bobby Jokes / Recent Jokes
One morning Bobby's mother was cleaning his room, and she found an S&M magazine under the bed. She was beside herself worrying and stressing trying to think of how to handle the situation.
Finally her husband came home from work and he asked her how her day was. The mother told him about the magazine. Shaking, she asked him how they were going handle this situation.
Her husband sat there for awhile, sighed, and said, "Well, I guess spanking him is out of the question."
It was a average day in Bobby's first grade class. Around 11:00 he had to go to the bathroom, so he raised his hand and ask the teacher. The teacher noticed this pattern and asked him a question " Bobby, if you want to go to the restroom, you have to recite the A-B-C's" Bobby being a below average student slowly recited
"a-b-c-d-e-f-g-h-i-j-k-l-m-n-o-q-r-s-t-u-v-w-x-y-z"
The teacher noticed that he was missing a letter so the teacher replied "Umm..Bobby, what happen to the p?" Bobby replied "Oh, I'm sorry Ms.Swanson, but its runnung down my leg
Two small boys, not yet old enough to be in school, were overheard talking at the zoo one day. "My name is Bobby. What's yours?" asked the first boy. "Danny," replied the second. "My Daddy's an accountant. What does your Daddy do for a living?" asked Bobby. Danny replied, "My Daddy's a lawyer." "Honest?" asked Bobby. "No, just the regular kind", replied Danny.
A father and his son, Bobby, arrive at the local Rugby match and Dad can't find the tickets.
Dad: "Nip home and see if I left the tickets there."
Bobby: "No probs, Dad."
Half an hour later Bobby returns to his dad who is patiently waiting outside the stadium.
Bobby: "Yep, they're on the kitchen table where you left them."
Editor's Note: Not really all humor, unless you consider grown men in tights slapping each others asses funny...
#1. Seen on a church sign in Arkansas prior to the 1969 game.
' Football is only a game.
Spiritual things are eternal.
Nevertheless, Beat Texas'
#2.' After you retire from football, there's only one big event left... and I ain't ready for that.' Bobby Bowden / Florida State
#3.' The man who complains about the way the ball bounces is likely to be the one who dropped it.' Lou Holtz / Arkansas
#4.' When you win, nothing hurts.' Joe Namath / Alabama
#5.' Motivation is simple. You eliminate those who are not motivated.' Lou Holtz / Arkansas
#6.' If you want to walk the heavenly streets of gold, you gotta know the password,' Roll, tide, roll!' Bear Bryant / Alabama
#7.' A school without football is in danger of deteriorating into a medieval study hall.' Frank Leahy / Notre more...
US Attorney General John Ashcroft was visiting an elementary school. After fifteen minutes speaking he says:' I will now answer anyquestions you have.' Bobby stands up and says:' I have four questions': 1. How did Bush win the election with fewer votes than Gore? 2. Why haven't you caught Osama bin Laden? 3. Why are you using the American Patriot Act to limit civil liberties? 4. Where are the weapons of mass destruction in Iraq? Just then the bell goes and the kids rushed out to play. Upon returning, Mr Ashcroft said: "I am sorry we were interrupted. I will answer any questions you have.' A little girl called Julie stands upand says:' I have six questions': 1. How did Bush win the election with fewer votes than Gore? 2. Why haven't you caught Osama bin Laden? 3. Why are you using the American Patriot Act to limit civil liberties? 4. Where are the weapons of mass destruction in Iraq? 5. Why did the bell ring twenty minutes early? 6. Where is Bobby?
Three college football coaches were flying across the country when their airplane crashed and all three died. They all noticed God up in the clouds sitting in a chair. God motioned for one of them to come into the clouds. God wanted to know three things: "Who are you? What did you do? What did people think of you?" The first coach said, "I'm Joe Paterno. I coached Penn State from 1966 to 2000. I won 300 games, 19 bowl victories, 2 national championships, and won Coach of the Year 4 times. The people of Pennsylvania think I'm great." God said, "Fine, Joe, stand at my right side." The next person said, "I'm Bobby Bowden. I coached Florida State University from 1980 to 2000. I had a. 816 win percentage, played in 14 bowl games without a loss and won a national championship after beating Nebraska. The people of Florida think I'm great." God said, "Fine, Bobby, stan d at my left side." The third coach stood before God and said, "I'm more...