Boil Jokes / Recent Jokes

A political activist named Dave was just arriving in Hell, and was told he had a choice to make. He could go to Capitalist Hell or to Communist Hell.
Naturally, Dave wanted to compare the two, so he wandered over to Capitalist Hell. There outside the door was Rockerfeller, looking bored. "What`s it like in there?" asked Dave. "Well," he replied, "In Capitalist Hell, they flay you alive, boil you in oil, chain you to a rock and let a vulture tear your liver out, and cut you up into small pieces with sharp knives."
"That`s terrible!!" gasped Dave. "I`m going to check out Communist Hell!" He went over to Communist Hell, where he discovered a huge line of people waiting to get in; the line circled around the lobby seven times before receding off into the horizon. Dave pushed his way through to the head of the line, where he found Karl Marx busily signing people in. Dave asked Karl what Communist Hell was like.
"In more...

A Singapore PR (previously came from Malaysia) named Ah Meng was just arriving in Hell, and was told he had a choice to make. He could go to Singapore Hell or to Malaysia Hell. Naturally, An Meng wanted to compare the two, so he wandered over to Malaysia Hell. There outside the door was Ah Lian, looking bored.' What's it like in there?' asked Ah Meng.' Well,' he replied, ' In Malaysia Hell, they flay you alive, boil you in oil, chain you to a rock and let a vulture tear your liver out, and cut you up into small pieces with sharp knives.'' That's terrible!' gasped Ah Meng.' I'm going to check out Singapore Hell!' He went over to Singapore Hell, where he discovered a huge line of people waiting to get in. The line circled around the lobby seven times before receding off into the horizon. Ah Meng pushed his way through to the head of the line, where he found An Gu busily signing people in. An Meng asked Ah Gu what Singapore Hell was like.' In Singapore Hell,' said An Gu impatiently,' more...

Dear Hot Ramen, I have a problem. Every morning at 6am the workers come into my neighbor's apartment, which is right next door to mine and start pounding on the walls. They just pound and pound until noon, take an hour rest and then pound some more. I work at home and I'm not getting any work done. My boss is threatening to fire me. I want to kill them, but my neighbor is hot and I've been wanting to get into his pants since I moved in. What should I do? Signed,
Neighborly Love (not related to Courtney)
Dear Neighborly, Aiyah! First thing- Get earplugs quick! Then talk to your neighbor about your little disturbance, but be sure to wear your earplugs so that your neighbor needs to shout to be heard. Keep asking him to speak louder and finally you can suggest you go into your apartment where it is not so noisy. When he comes in quickly take out the earplugs and feed him some
of Hot Ramen's speeecial Ooh-la-la Ramen Romance Soup. This soup is from an ancient soup recipe more...