Bone Jokes / Recent Jokes

old mother huberd went to the cupboard to fetch her poor dog a bone when she bent over rover tuck over and gave her a bone of her own

Jack be nimble.
Jack be quick.
Jack jumped over the candlestick.
GREAT BALLS AFIRE!!!
Old Mother Hubbard
Went to the cubbard
To get her poor dog a bone.
But when she bent over
Rover took over
Because this dog had a bone of his own.
Mary had a little sheep.
She took it to bed one night to sleep.
The sheep turned out to be a ram.
That's how Mary had a little lamb.
Peter, Peter pumpkin eater
Had a wife and couldn't feed her.
So he ate her.

Q: What is a werewolf's favorite type of story?
A: A hairy tale!
Q: Did you hear about the hippie werewolf?
A: He was fur out, man!
Q: What do you call two witches who live together?
A: Brommates!
Q: Did you hear about the obnoxious pumpkin?
A: He was a real jerk-o'-lantern!
Q: What does an Australian witch ride on?
A: A broomerang!
Q: What would you get if you crossed a witch with a famous director?
A: Steven Spellberg!
Q: Where do spooks go to mail a letter?
A: The ghost office.
Q: What did the vampire say to the Invisible Man?
A: "Long time, no see!"
Q: When is it bad luck to have a black cat follow you?
A: When you're a mouse!
Q: What happened when the little witch misbehaved?
A: She was sent to her broom.
Q: What do you say to a depressed vampire?
A: "Fang in thre!"
Q: How do you make a skeleton laugh?
A: Try tickling his funny bone!
Q: What more...

* Emergency Rooms will tell you one of the most common injury suffered in falling out of bed for a guy is a broken dick. Although the penis does not have a "bone" it is full of erectile tissue that can be bent too far to the point of snapping. This type of injury requires surgery to correct. Often it can result in massive hemorrhaging.
* The man who accidentally sent a knee into his lovers face in the dark as he climbed up to *** ***k her. Broke her nose, blackened both her eyes and knocked out three teeth, one of which had to be dug out of his kneecap. It had dug down to the bone and stuck there.
* Getting nailed in the nuts is no joke either, a friend of mine got an unintended knee in the groin when he and his girl were changing positions and the impact ruptured a vein. His ball sack filled with blood. It swelled to a diameter of seven inches and turned black on the way to the hospital. The good folks at the Emergency Room had to lance it upon arrival and it more...