Bored Jokes / Recent Jokes
One Saturday, Little Johnny's bored, so he says to his father, "Dad, I'm bored. What's there to do?"
His dad decides to have a little fun with him, so he gives Johnny four quarters. "Here, son," his father says, "why don't you go to the drugstore and get me some 'what's what'?"
Excited, although somewhat baffled, Johnny rushes down the street to the drugstore. He approaches the druggist and asks him for some 'what's what'. Initially, the druggist is confused, but soon guesses that this kid has been sent out on a wild goose chase.
"I'm sorry, young man, we don't have any, but that building over there might," the druggist says, as he points towards a whorehouse.
Filled with excitement, Johnny races over to the whorehouse. He knocks on the door and a naked woman answers it.
"I need some... hey, what's that?" Johnny says, motioning to her crotch.
"What's what?" she replies.
Satisfied, Johnny says, more...
Judi was bored with driving her BMW. It laced individuality and besides that, every other girl in the office had one. She fancied something a bit more individual, perhaps an MG convertible. That week she visited her local car dealer and spied a beautiful Jaguar XK140 convertible. It was wonderfully restored and she fell in love with its gorgeous red paint work. An empty check stub later and off she was tearing down the leafy country lanes enjoying her beautiful new car. Her long blonde hair was flowing in the wind, music blaring from the radio, what could possibly go wrong? At that thought there was a splutter from the engine and the car slowly coasted to a stop. She got out and lifted the bonnet and concluded after a few minutes that she didn't have a bloody clue what was wrong. Luckily she had her mobile phone with her and a quick phone call to the AutoClub and a short wait saw a bright shiny yellow van pull up behind her."That's a lovely car," said the mechanic. more...
A bored woman says to her husband as she clasps her hands together, "Guess what I have in here and you'll get some loving tonite." The equally bored husband, wishing to avoid any kind of sex at all replies, "An elephant". The wife sez "That's close enough!"
Once, two sardars were feeling bored and decided to play a few games
Of chess to pass the time.
They were doing this for some time, when two more sardar friends
Dropped by. Seeing them play chess, they said -
"come on guys, we are feeling bored too. Let us play doubles!"
Obsessive cyberflirt, actually 47 years old and hasn't left her house in weeks but feels loved because she has 300 AOL'ers chasing her.
Odinist Mafiosi dominatrix gangster's moll, in Norway and bored because she hasn't shed any blood in THREE DAYS, let alone killed anyone.
Cyberspace Jaye Davidson, considers himself trapped in a man's body but won't admit it.
Illiterate bimbo, knows how to use the SHOUT command on MUDs and nothing else.
Smirking college student who thinks it's so fun to tease men, and does nothing but IRC on #hotsex because she's the star of the show. Uses the name of one of her sorority sisters so that the losers who track her down don't pester HER.
AOL hacker-wannabe. Will sleep with anyone who can tell her about Kevin Mitnick.
Bored grad student's AI routine "blonde.c"
Kibo.
Achmed Darsein, who is cleverly disguising himself as a woman in order to learn about the USA and blow up the World Trade Center again. Your first clue more...
A blonde and her boyfriend were setting at home one night and became bored.
"Hey, let's play a game" she said."What game?" was his bored reply.
"Let's play hide'n'seek. I'll give you a blow-job if you can find me."
"What if I can't find you?"
"I'll be behind the piano."
Far away in the tropical waters of the Caribbean, two prawns were swimming around in the sea - one called Justin and the other called Christian. Prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that patrolled the area.
Finally one day during a tropical storm, Justin said to Christian "I'm bored and frustrated at being a prawn, I wish I was a shark - then I wouldn't have any worries about being eaten..." As Justin had his mind firmly on becoming a predator, a flash of lightning hits the water and lo and behold, Justin turns into a shark. Horrified, Christian immediately swims away, afraid of being eaten by his old mate.
Time went on and Justin found himself becoming bored and lonely as a shark. All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them, Justin hardly realizing that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.
During the next tropical storm, Justin figures that the same lightening force more...