Bucket Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q&A's about Salami Bin Coward & the Talibuttheads:
Q: Why does Salami Bin Coward carry a Turd in his pocket?
A: It's his photo ID.
Q: What do Salami Bin Coward and Hiroshima have in common?
A: Nothing - "yet".
Q: How do you play Talibutthead bingo?
A: B-52...F-16...B-1...
Q: What is the Talibuttheads national bird?
A: Duck.
Q: How is Salami Bin Coward like Fred Flintstone?
A: Both may look out their windows and see Rubble.
Q: What does Salami Bin Coward and General Custer have in common?
A: They both want to know where those Tomahawks are coming from!
Q: What's the difference between the Talibuttheads and a bucket of crap?
A: The bucket.
Q: What's the five day forecast for Afghanistan?
A: Two days.
Q: Why don't Salami Bin Coward's people eat turd sandwiches?
A: They hate bread.
Q: Why don't the Talibuttheads have drivers ed and sex ed classes on the same day?
A: The camels can't handle it.

An American-Indian walks into a saloon with a shotgun in one hand and a 10-litre bucket of manure in the other.
The Indian says to the bartender,
"Me want Lager!"
The bartender says, "Sure, Chief, coming right up."
He then serves the Indian a
tall glass of Tennents Lager.
The Indian drinks it down in one gulp, picks up the bucket, throws the manure into the air and blasts it with the shotgun. He then walks out.
Five days later, the Indian returns. He has his shotgun in one hand and another bucket of manure in the other.
He struts up to the bar and tells the bartender, "Me want beer!"
The bartender says, "Whoa there Chief, we're still cleaning up from the last time you were here... What was that all
about, anyway?" he asked.
The Indian explained, "Me training for job as government employee. Drink beer, shoot the shit, disappear for a few days, then
come back and see if somebody else has cleaned more...

Q&A's about Salami Bin Coward & the Talibuttheads:Q: Why does Salami Bin Coward carry a Turd in his pocket? A: It's his photo ID.Q: What do Salami Bin Coward and Hiroshima have in common? A: Nothing - "yet".Q: How do you play Talibutthead bingo? A: B-52...F-16...B-1...Q: What is the Talibuttheads national bird? A: Duck.Q: How is Salami Bin Coward like Fred Flintstone? A: Both may look out their windows and see Rubble.Q: What does Salami Bin Coward and General Custer have in common? A: They both want to know where those Tomahawks are coming from! Q: What's the difference between the Talibuttheads and a bucket of crap? A: The bucket.Q: What's the five day forecast for Afghanistan? A: Two days.Q: Why don't Salami Bin Coward's people eat turd sandwiches? A: They hate bread.Q: Why don't the Talibuttheads have drivers ed and sex ed classes on the same day? A: The camels can't handle it.

One evening a man walked into a fast-food chicken place and bought a nine-piece bucket of chicken. He took his chicken to the park for a romantic dinner under the moonlight with his lady. Upon reaching into the bucket, however, he received a surprise. Instead of chicken he discovered what was apparently the restaurant`s night deposit - some nine thousand bucks. The young man brought the bucket back to the store and asked for his chicken in exchange for the money. The manager, in awe of the young man`s honesty, asked for his name and told him he wanted to call the newspaper and the local news station to do a story on him. He would become a local hero, an example of honesty and morality that would inspire others! The hungry man shrugged it off, "My date`s waiting. I just want my chicken." The manager`s renewed amazement over the young man`s humility almost overwhelmed him. He begged to be allowed to tell the story on the news. At this the honest man became angry with the more...

A MAN in western attire went into a bar and asked for 30 martinis in a bucket.
"What?" questioned the bartender, "Why would you want so many martinis?"
"My horse likes them," replied the cowboy, "and he's tied to a parking meter out front dying of thirst. I want to surprise him."
So the bartender got busy and came up with a bucket of martinis.
"If you don't mind," he said, "I'd like to see this boozing horse with my own eyes."
"Be my guest," said the customer, and the two went outside and placed the bucket by the horse, who drank deeply.
"Darnedest thing I ever saw," said the bartender. "Why don't you come back in and I'll mix you a few on the house."
"No, I couldn't do that," said the man. "But thanks anyway."
"What's the matter?" asked the bartender. "Don't you like martinis?"
"Love'em," replied the cowboy, more...

During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director:' How do you determine whether or not a patient should be institutionalized?'

'Well,' said the Director,' we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub.'

'Oh, I understand,' said the visitor.' A normal person would use the bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup.'
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.
.
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No.' said the Director,' A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?'

3 married women are sitting around chatting about their married life and eventually the subject of birth control comes up.
The 1st woman says, "Well, we use condoms and they seem to work ok; we only have 3 children after 20 years of marriage."
The 2nd woman speaks up. "We use the pill and it works really well; we only have 2 children after 20 years of marriage."
The 3rd woman finally speaks up and says, "Well, we don't go for any of that fancy stuff; we use the bucket and saucer method and we don't have any children after 15 years of marriage and we have sex just about every day."
The 2 other women are shocked that someone could be married for 15 years and not use any conventional birth control and not have children so they ask the 3rd woman what the bucket and saucer method is so they can try it.
The 3rd woman says, "Well, I am 6 feet tall and my husband is 5 foot 4, and every time we have sex we are standing up. Now, as he is so more...