Butt Jokes / Recent Jokes

There were two teenagers and they just got thru playing basketball. So they went to the showerhouse.They were in the showerhouse and the first teenager noticed a cork up the other teenagers butt. So when they got out of the showerhouse, the first teenager ask why he had a cork up his butt? The other teenager said, "Well, I was at the beach and a fairy said she could grant me one wish", and in amazement I said - "No CRAP!"

-Why do brunettes like their dark hair color? It doesn't show the dirt. - Who makes all the bras for brunettes? Fisher-Price-Why didn't Indians scalp brunettes? The hair from a buffalo's butt was more manageable. - Why are most brunettes flat-chested? It makes it easier for them to read their T-shirts. - Why are brunettes so proud of their hair? It matches their mustache. - Why is the color brunette considered evil? When's the last time ya saw a blonde witch?-How can you tell a brunette is lonely? Check her for a pulse. - What is the most frustrated animal in the world? A brunette rabbit. - Why do brunettes wear training bras? It's cheaper than changing their Band-Aids every day. - Why did they quit selling brunette Barbie dolls? Parents felt the dandruffmight be contagious. - How do brunettes get the tangles out their hair? With a rake. - Why don't brunettes get breast implants? They've already spent their money on thigh & butt implants. - Why did God create brunettes? So ugly men more...

Bubba got drunk and died in a fire in his trailer. He was so badly burned that the morgue needed someone to identify the body, so they called his two buddies Jim-Bob and Billy-Joe to I.D. him. Jim-Bob went in and the mortician pulled back the sheet. "Yep, he's got burned up purdy bad. Roll 'im over," said Jim-Bob. The mortician rolled him over, Jim-Bob looked at his butt and said, "Nope, dat ain't Bubba." Not saying anything, but finding it a bit strange, the mortician brought in Billy-Joe to I.D. the body. "Yep, he's burned up real bad. Roll 'im over," said Billy-Joe. The mortician rolled him over, Billy-Joe looked down at his butt and said, "Dat ain't Bubba." "How can you tell?" asked the mortician. "Cause Bubba had two assholes," replied Billy-Joe. "Two assholes? That's impossible!" said the mortician. "Yep. Everyone in town knowed Bubba had two assholes, cause every time the three of us went to town, more...

Bubba got drunk and died in a fire in his trailer. He was so badly burned that the morgue needed someone to identify the body, so they called his two buddies Jim-Bob and Billy-Joe to I.D. him.
Jim-Bob went in and the mortician pulled back the sheet. "Yep, he's got burned up purdy bad. Roll 'im over," said Jim-Bob. The mortician rolled him over, Jim-Bob looked at his butt and said, "Nope, dat ain't Bubba."
Not saying anything, but finding it a bit strange, the mortician brought in Billy-Joe to I.D. the body. "Yep, he's burned up real bad. Roll 'im over," said Billy-Joe. The mortician rolled him over, Billy-Joe looked down at his butt and said, "Dat ain't Bubba."
"How can you tell?" asked the mortician.
"Cause Bubba had two assholes," replied Billy-Joe. "Two assholes? That's impossible!" said the mortician.
"Yep. Everyone in town knowed Bubba had two assholes, cause every time the three of us more...

The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table.
I will not roll my toys behind the fridge, behind the sofa or under the bed.
I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house.
I will not eat the cats' food, before they eat it or after they throw it up.
I will stop trying to find the few remaining pieces of clean carpet in the house when I am about to get sick.
I will not throw up in the car.
I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.
"Kitty box crunchies," although they are tasty, are not food.
I will not eat any more Kleenex or napkins and then redeposit them in the backyard after processing.
The diaper pail is not a cookie jar.
I will not chew my human's toothbrush and not tell them.
I will not chew crayons or pens, especially not the red ones, or my people will think I am more...

three men a blonde a red-head and a brunette were out on a safari in africa they got lost in the middle of the jungle when they came across a tribe that said go find 5 fruit and we wont kill you but tell you the way out of the jungle, soo off the 3 went with a man from the tribe to make sure they didn't run off the brunette comes back with 5 grapes and the leader of the tribe says shove them up your butt and if you can and keep a staigh face we wont kill you the brunette does it while keeping a straight face so they show him the was out of the jungle. the red-head comes back with 5 cocnuts adn the leader says get on your knees and shove these up your butt while keeping a straight face and we will show you the way out of the jungle the man gets 3 up successfully and then starts to laugh the leader askes before he kills him why he was laughing the red-head replys "
i saw the blonde coming back with 5 watermelons"

For BB King's birthday, his wife wanted to give him something very special! BB already had pretty much everything a person could want, money, fame and happiness! BB's wife decided to get "BB" tattooed on her butt, a "B" on each butt cheek.
That night, after eating dinner and cake, she decided to give BB her gift. After explaining that her gift was very special, she proceeded bend over and pull her pants down, revealing her bare, tattooed ass! She told "BB" to look.
He looked and said, "That's great honey... but who in the fuck is BOB?"