Cabinet Jokes / Recent Jokes
A newly nominated chief minister was under pressure from all his supporters to appoint them as cabinet minister. Or else!
The much harassed chief minister sought the
advice of his guru. *Very simple', replied the sage,
'select nine on three principles.'
'O holy one!' pleaded the chief minister,' please
enlighten this ignoramus on the three principles of
selection.'
'Three should be sachha - truthful.'
The chief minister looked over the list of his
supporters and crossed out all the names.
"Three should be suchha - dean.'
The chief minister took a second look at the list
and again crossed out all the names.
'Three should be luchhas - vagabonds.'
The chief minister went over the list and looked more puzzled than before.' All of them qualify under the third category. "What should I do?' he pleaded.
'Give all of them some kind of post or the other. Tell everyone that they are all luchhas and the only more...
Hotel Letters
The following letters were taken from an actual incident between aLondon hotel and one of its guests. The hotel submitted the letters to the London SundayTimes for their humor column....
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Maid,
Please do not leave any more of those little barsof soap in my bathroom since I have brought my own bath-sized Dial. Please remove the sixunopened little bars from the shelf under the medicine chest and another three in theshower soap dish. They are in my way.
Thank you,
S. Berman
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Room 635,
I am not your regular maid. She will be backtomorrow, Thursday, from her day off. I took the 3 hotel soaps out of the shower soap dishas you requested. The 6 bars on your shelf I took out of your way and put on top of yourKleenex dispenser in case you more...
Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse and a miniskirt and high heels. My measurements are 36-24-36. I work out every day. I'm toned and perfect. What do you look like?
Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds. I wear glasses and I have on a pair of blue sweat pants I just bought at Walmart. I am also wearing a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner - it smells a little funny.
Sweetheart: I want you. Would you like to screw me?
Wellhung: OK.
Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom. There's soft music playing on the stereo and candles on my dresser and night table. I'm looking up into your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.
Wellhung: I'm gulping. I'm beginning to sweat.
Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.
Wellhung: Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse. My hands are more...
Q: How has Clinton made his cabinet look more like America? A: Many of them have sixth grade reading levels.
Minister for Industries, another for Rural Industries, and yet
another for Small Industries: -): -): -)
SL has geared up for massive development. You can see from the no of ministries the amount of development that is going to take place in the next 6 years.
1. There are two ministers to look after the people who do nothing.
2. There is a minister for Transport and minister for High ways. I never knew that Highways were not used for transport. They could created another minitry for railways.
3. You have a fisheries minister and another minister to looking to the fisheries housing. May be they are planning to implement a Work from home policy for the fishermen.
4. One minister for Mahaweli development and another for irrigation and another for power and energy. Who will look into
the resevoirs which do all three functions. I guess it will be all.
5. There is a minister the Tamils in the North and east what about the Tamils in more...
1. If someone calls while you are on the phone, do not answer the call waiting signals, after all your conversation to your boyfriend`s, cousin`s, sister`s, ex-best friend`s, father-in-law`s, stepson is probably too important to be interrupted. 2. Of course there is no need to record any messages on a piece of paper. a. you would have to actually walk towards the kitchen to get to the pad of paper which requires that you write down a name and check off a few boxes b. but more importantly, all roommates have mental telepathy and are aware that if you tell the party on the phone that he/she will be called back at the callee`s first free moment, the callee will telepathically be aware of this 3. Don`t buy anything for the apartment, use and abuse other roommates items until they are destroyed and wait for them to buy a new one (case example: the spatula). 4. Feel free to leave any and all dirty dishes wherever you please, certainly one of your roommates has taken classes in more...
Why did the blonde tip toe past the medicine cabinet? So she wouldn't wake up the Sleeping Pills.