Chastity Jokes / Recent Jokes
U.S. Lawmaker Says He Is Worried About E-Mail Pregnancy
Citing the case of a woman who claims she got pregnant from e-mail,
an Ohio Democrat called Wednesday for a "chastity chip" for the
Internet. Rep. James Traficant, known for his flamboyant rhetoric,
gave a brief floor speech about a woman named Frances who claimed to
have gotten pregnant through an e-mail exchange with a paramour 1,500
miles away. "That's right - pregnant," he proclaimed, warning of the
dangers of "immaculate reception." He called on Congress to go beyond
"v-chips" that would protect kids from sexual content on the
Internet, saying, "Its time for Congress to act. The computers do not
need a v-chip. The Internet needs a chastity chip."
All the good knights were leaving for the Crusades. One knight told his best friend, "My bride is without doubt one of the most beautiful women in the world. It would be a terrible waste if no man could have her. Therefore, as my best and most trusted friend, I am leaving you the key to her chastity belt to use should I not return from the Crusade."
The company of knights were only a mile or so out of town when they noticed a cloud of dust approaching. Thinking it might be an important message from the town the column halted. A horseman approached. It was the knight's best friend.
He said "Hey, you gave me the wrong key!!"
A young missionary had just taken up a new post in a remote Maori village. The young man was the first white man to set foot in the area in quite some time.
Upon entering the village he was quite distressed at the liberal attitude towards sexual practices and began to preach chastity to his new flock with a vengence.
10 months later the daughter of the chief gives birth to a white baby. As the missionary is the only white man around the chief furiously confronts him.
"You preach chastity to me and all the time you are doing the devils work with my daughter. I'm going to kill you, you hypocrite."
"No it wasn't me" stammered the missionary "It's just a freak of nature."
"Oh sure! A black woman gives birth to a white baby and you're the only white man for miles and you call it a freak of nature. Now I'm going to kill you slowly."
"No, it's true" responded the missionary. "It's called an albino. These sort of more...
Chastity Bono has decided to swap out her vagina for a penis.
Sonny Bono would be spinning over in his grave...
but the skis wont let him.
Its official Chastity Bono will indeed receive the well preserved penis of hall of fame pitchman, Billie Mays, to complete her gender transformation.
When asked for comment Chastity, err Charles, replied.
"I love beautiful wood!!"