Cheat Jokes / Recent Jokes
Once a Sardarji was travelling on a train. He felt sleepy so he gave the guy sitting opposite him on the train 20 rupees to wake him up when the station arrived. This guy was a barber, and he felt that for 20 rupees, the sardarji deserved more service. So, when the Sardarji fell asleep, the barber quietly shaved off his beard. When the station arrived, the Sardarji was woken up, and he went home. Reaching home, he went to wash his face, and suddenly screamed
when he saw the mirror. Said his wife " What's the matter?" Replied he "The cheat on the train has taken my 20 rupees and woken up someone else"
Q. Why does Bill Clinton cheat on Hillary?
A. He wants to be on top.
Sid and Barney head out for a quick round of golf. Since they are short on time, they decide to play only 9 holes. Sid offers Barney, "let's say we make the time worth the while, at least for one of us, and spot $5 on the lowest score for the day." Barney agrees and they enjoy a great game. After the 8th hole, Barney is ahead by 1 stroke, but cuts his ball into the rough on the 9th." Help me find my ball, you look over there," he says to Sid. After 5 minutes, neither has had any luck, and since a lost ball carries a four-point penalty, Barney pulls a ball from his pocket and tosses it to the ground. "I've found my ball!" he announces triumphantly. Sid looks at him forlornly, "After all the years we've been friends, you'd cheat me on golf for a measly five bucks?!?" "What do you mean cheat? I found my ball sitting right here!""And a liar, too!!!" Sid says with amazement. "I'll have you know I've been standing on your ball more...
Two lawyers, Jon and Amanpreet, head out for their usual 9 holes of golf. Jon offers Amanpreet a $50 bet. Amanpreet agrees and they're off. They shoot a great game. After the 8th hole, Amanpreet is ahead by one stroke, but cuts his ball into the rough on the 9th. ''Help me find my ball. Look over there,'' he says to Jon. After a few minutes, neither has any luck. Since a lost ball carries a four point penalty, Amanpreet secretly pulls a ball from his pocket and tosses it to the ground. ''I've found my ball!'' he announces. ''After all of the years we've been partners and playing together," Jon says, "you'd cheat me out of a lousy 50 bucks?'' ''What do you mean, cheat? I found my ball sitting right there!''''And you're a liar, too!'' Jon says. ''I'll have you know I've been STANDING on your ball for the last five minutes!''
An old farmer is outside for a walk around his land when he sees a sign on his neighbor's lawn: "Horse for Sale". Curious, he decides to have a look-see. As he approaches his neighbor's stable, he sees his old Italian friend brushing down a fine looking stallion.
"Hello friend, I saw your sign out there and came over to see your horse for sale."
Now, the Italian farmer speaks very poor English, but manages to answer well enough. "Yep, yep, disa is da horse for-a sale."
"This horse here?" quizzes the old farmer, "Why he's a fine horse! Why-ever would you sell him?"
"Well," sighs the Italian farmer, "He no looka so good anymore."
The old farmer, convinced that his neighbor has lost his mind, makes the sale and leads the horse across his field over to the stable. As he taps the horse gently on the back to coax him into the stable, he watches as the horse misses the more...
Three men died in a car accident and met God in heaven.
"I will ask you each a simple question. If you tell the truth you will enter heaven, but if you lie. .. hell is waiting for you," God told them.
To the first man God asked, "How many times did you cheat on your wife?"
The first man replied, "I was a good husband. I never cheated on my wife."
God replied, "Very good! Not only will I allow you in, but for being faithful to your wife I will give you a huge mansion and a limo for your transportation."
To the second man God asked, "How many times did you cheat on your wife?"
The second man replied, "I cheated on my wife twice."
God replied, "I will allow you to come in, but for your unfaithfulness, you will get a four-bedroom house and a BMW."
To the third man God asked, "So, how many times did you cheat on your more...
01. I get up at 6 a. m., no matter what time it is.
02. Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook. But the law allows only one wife.
03. One woman`s hobby is another woman`s hubby.
04. The easiest way to make your old car run better, is to check the prices of a new car.
05. It`s what people don`t know about each other that makes them such good friends.
06. I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
07. I`m an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.
08. When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
09. Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.
10. By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you`ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you`ll become a philosopher... and that is a good thing for any man.
11. Marriage is bliss. Ignorance more...