Chick Jokes / Recent Jokes
Whats the difference between a blonde chick and a mosquito?
If you slap a mosquito it will stop sucking! !
A man walked into the clubhouse and noticed a friend sitting in a corner wearing a neck brace.
He sat down and asked his mate what happened.
“Well, I was playing golf and I hit my ball into the rough, ” replied his friend.
“Then I met a chick who was looking for her ball too. Finding mine, I thought I’d give her a hand. There was a cow nearby and I noticed that every time the cow twitched its tail there was a flash of white. So I went over to it and lifted its tail and sure enough there was the ball. I called out to the chick and said, ‘Lady, does this look like yours? ’ And the bitch hit me in the neck with her driver! ”
What do you get when you cross a chick with an alley cat?
A peeping tom.
Why did the dirty chicken cross the road? For some fowl purpose! How do sheep keep warm in winter? Central bleating! How do chickens dance? Chick to chick! What do you call a crazy chicken? A cuckoo-cluck! What do you call a bull who tells jokes? Laugh-a-bull! What do you get if you cross a cow, a sheep and a goat? The milky baa kid! What is a duck's favorite dance? The quackstep! Which dance will a chicken not do? The foxtrot! What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? A woolly jumper!
Two guys are in a bar and the guy says to his friend, "I wanna lose 10 pounds."
His friend says, "Okay give me one hundred dollars."
The guy gives him the money and leaves the bar.
A day later a hot chick is in the guy''s front yard. She says, "If you can catch me, I will have sex with you."
The guy chases her around for an hour and loses 10 pounds.
The next day a guy tells the first guy''s friend, "I wanna lose 20 pounds."
The friend says, "Okay give me two hundred dollars."
The second guy gives the friend the money and leaves.
The next day a hot chick is in the second guy''s yard.
She says, "If you can catch me you can have sex with me."
The second guy chases her around for two hours and loses 20 pounds.
The next day a fast olympic athlete tells the guys'' friend he wants to lose 30 pounds.
The more...
This bartender is in a bar, when this really hot chick walks up and says in a sexy seductive voice, "May I please speak to your manager?"
He says, "Not right now, is there anything I can help you with?"
She replies, "I don't know if your the man to talk to...its kind of personal..."
Thinking he might get lucky, he goes, "I'm pretty sure I can handle your problem, miss."
She then looks at him with a smile, and puts two of her fingers in his mouth...and he begins sucking them, thinking "I'm in!!!"
She goes, "Can you give the manager something for me?"
The bartender nods...yes. "Tell him there's no toilet paper in the ladies restroom."
Q: How do you tell if a chick is too fat to fuck?
A: When you pull her pants down and her arse is still in them.