Cindy Jokes / Recent Jokes
You might recall that John Hinckley was the seriously deranged young man who shot President Reagan in the early 1980s. Hinckley was absolutely obsessed with movie star Jodie Foster, extremely jealous, and in his twisted mind, loved Jodie Foster to the point that to make himself well known to her, he attempted to assassinate President Reagan.
There is speculation Hinckley may soon be released as having been rehabilitated. Consequently, you may appreciate the following letter from former presidential hopeful John McCain to Mr. Hinkley. The staff at the mental facility where Hinkley is being treted is reported to have intercepted this memo and it reads as follows:
To: John Hinckley
From: Sen. John McCain, R AZ.
My wife and I wanted to drop you a short note to tell you how pleased we are with the great strides you are making in your recovery. In our fine country's spirit of understanding and forgiveness, we want you to know there is more...
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Cindy!
Cindy who?
Cindy next one in please!
There was a 16 year old boy who's name was Darry. He had to babysit his mother's friends baby Cindy. He had to do everything the baby says or he will get grounded. After the parents left the house Darry hopped on the sofa and started to watch TV. It was past the baby's bedtime so he said "go to bed."
Cindy wanted to watch TV. She said "I will ground you for a month if you dont let me watch TV." Darry let her watch TV.
After Darry went to take a bath. Cindy got bored watching TV so she knocked on the bathroom door and asked if she could take a bath with him. He said "no." She said "I'll ground you for two months." He still said "no." She said "a year." He said "ok you could take a bath with me."
When Cindy was in the bathtub she point between Darry's thighs and asked "what is that." He said "that is my best friend Harry."
Finnaly they went to sleep. Cindy said "can I sleep more...
The first time I saw Cindy Sheehan on TV, I was like, "Why is Gary Shandling so angry about the war?" When I found out the person I was looking at was Cindy Sheehan and that she was protesting the war because her son was a soldier who died in Iraq, I felt my heart brimming over with sympathy. "My God," I thought, "This poor woman is going to spend the rest of her life looking like the third Doctor Who (Actor Tom Baker)."
Cindy's son didn't get drafted, he volunteered. She should have gotten out her megaphone when he first told her he was joining the army. Then she should have followed him around all day yelling, "If you join the army you might die!" Although I doubt that even that would have worked. If my mom was Cindy Sheehan, I would volunteer to deactivate roadside bombs with my face.
Now Cindy is participating in a hunger strike with famous actors like Sean Penn and Danny Glover, because apparently they believe President Bush's fear more...
There were these three models going by air to a photo shoot, Elle Mcpherson, Cindy Crawford, and Naomi Campbell.
Halfway through the flight the plane had engine trouble, the pilot warned the girls to assume the crash position, just in case they went down.
Elle put on more make-up saying, "They always rescued the beautiful ones first".
Cindy donned her jewelery claiming, "They would rescue the richest one first", upon which Naomi, threw off all her clothes, pressing herself against the window saying "You're both wrong, the first thing they look for is the Black Box"!
There were these three models going by air to a photo shoot, Elle Mcpherson, Cindy Crawford, and Naomi Campbell.Halfway through the flight the plane had engine trouble, the pilot warned the girls to assume the crash position, just in case they went down.Elle put on more make-up saying, "They always rescued the beautiful ones first".Cindy donned her jewelery claiming, "They would rescue the richest one first", upon which Naomi, threw off all her clothes, pressing herself against the window saying "You're both wrong, the first thing they look for is the Black Box"!
This guy was stranded on a desert island with Cindy Crawford. He was cool, and he didn't make any moves towards her for several weeks.
Finally one day he asked her if maybe they could start up a physical relationship, so as to attend to each other's needs. Cindy said she was game, and a very nice sexual relationship began.
Everything was great for about 4 months. One day the guy goes to Cindy and says, "I'm having this problem... It's kind of a guy thing, but I need to ask you a favor." Cindy replied "Okay," and he says, "Can I borrow your eyebrowpencil?" Cindy looks at him a little funny, but answers, "Sure, you can borrow my eyebrow pencil."
The guy then says, "Do you mind if I use the eyebrow pencil to draw a mustache on you?"
Cindy is getting a little worried, but says "Okay." And so the guy draws a moustache on her.
Then the guy said, "Can you wear some of my guy clothing, I need for you to more...