Circled Jokes / Recent Jokes

After four years of separation, a man and his wife finally divorced amicably. He wanted to date again, but he had no idea of how to start, so he decided to look in the personals column of the local newspaper.
After reading through all the listings, he circled three that seemed possible in terms of age and interest, but he put off calling them.
Two days later, there was a message on his answering machine from his ex-wife:
"I came over to your house to borrow some tools today and saw the ads you circled in the paper. Don't call the one in the second column. It's me."

A driver tucked this note under the windshield wiper of his automobile. "Ive circled the block for 20 minutes. Im late for an appointment, and if I dont park here Ill lose my job. Forgive us our trespasses." When he came back he found a parking ticket and this note: "Ive circled the block for 20 years, and if I dont give you a ticket, Ill lose my job. Lead us not into temptation."