Co-pilot Jokes / Recent Jokes
One day at a busy airport, the passengers on a commercial airliner are seated, waiting for the cockpit crew to show up so they can get under way.
The pilot and co-pilot finally appear in the rear of the plane, and begin walking up to the cockpit through the center aisle. Both appear to be blind. The pilot is using a white cane, bumping into passengers right and left as he stumbles down the aisle, and the co-pilot is using a guide dog. Both have their eyes covered with huge sunglasses. At first the passengers do not react; thinking that it must be some sort of practical joke. However, after a few minutes the engines start spooling up and the airplane starts moving down the runway.
The passengers look at each other with some uneasiness, whispering among themselves and looking desperately to the stewardesses for reassurance. Then the airplane starts accelerating rapidly and people begin panicking. Some passengers are praying, and as the plane gets closer and closer to the end more...
A Blonde was on her way to Mexico, She boarded the plane and sat in First class!.The stuardess came out and said
"
excuse me, you haven't paided for first class your going to have to return back to your normal seat in ecomony"
the blonde replies
"
I'm blonde and beautiful I'm not moving anywhere!"
so the stuardess went and talked to the pilot and co-pilot.So the pilot came out and talked to the blonde but still she was not going to move.Finally the co-pilot came out and said to his friends don't worry I'l get her to move, I have a blonde wife, I can talk blondish.
so the co-pilot went up to the blonde and whispered in her ear, she got up immediately and said "
oh sorry, I didn't know"
The pilot came up to the co-pilot and said"
In all my life I have never seen anything like that, how d'ya get her to move?"
"
oh, I just said that first class wasn't going to Mexico!"
A Polish airline was landing in an American runway for the first time. The pilot lands the plane and slams on the breaks. The plane comes to a screeching stop, and the Polish co-pilot says to the pilot, "Boy, these American runways sure are short!" The pilot says to the co-pilot, "Yeah, but look how wide they are!!" A man stops at construction site to get job. Entering, he finds the supervisor yelling the out window, "Green side up!" The guy starts to fill out an application and a few seconds later the super again yells out the window, "Green side up!" A few minutes later, same thing, "Green side up!" By now the applicant is so curious that he asks super why he`s yelling. The super disgustedly replies, "Polish sod layers."
On a plane bound for New York the flight attendant approached a blonde sitting in the first class section and requested that she move to coach since she did not have a first class ticket. The blonde replied, "I'm blonde; I'm beautiful; I'm going to New York; and I'm not moving." Not wanting to argue with a customer, the flight attendant asked the co-pilot to speak with her. He went to talk with the woman, asking her to please move out of the first class section. Again, the blonde replied, "I'm blonde; I'm beautiful; I'm going to New York, and I'm not moving." The co-pilot returned to the cockpit and asked the captain what he should do. The captain said, "I'm married to a blonde, and I know how to handle this." He went to the first class section and whispered in the blonde's ear. She immediately jumped up and ran to the coach section mumbling to herself, "Why didn't someone just say so?" Surprised, the flight attendant and the co-pilot asked what more...
What is ideal Flight Deck complement for a modern airliner?
A Captain, a Co-pilot and a dog. The dog is there to bite the captain if he tries to touch the controls, and the co-pilot is there to feed the dog.
On a plane bound for New York the flight attendant approached a blonde sitting in the first class section and requested that she move to economy since she did not have a first class ticket. The blonde replied, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to New York and I'm not moving." Not wanting to argue with a customer the flight attendant asked the co-pilot to speak with her. He went to talk with the woman asking her to please move out of the first class section. Again, the blonde replied, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to New York and I'm not moving." The co-pilot returned to the cockpit and asked the captain what to do about her. The captain said, "I'm married to a blonde, and I know how to handle this." He went to the first class section and whispered in the blonde's ear. She immediately jumped up and ran to the economy section mumbling to herself, "Why didn't anyone just say so?" Surprised, the flight attendant and the co-pilot asked more...