Colin Jokes / Recent Jokes
While visiting England, George Bush is invited to tea with the Queen. He asks her what her leadership philosophy is. She says that it is to surround herself with intelligent people. He asks how she knows if they're intelligent.
"I do so by asking them the right questions," says the Queen."Allow me to demonstrate."
She phones Tony Blair and says, "Mr. Prime Minister. Please answer this question: Your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?"
Tony Blair responds, "It
Knock Knock Who's there? Colin! Colin who? Colin all cars, Colin all cars!
After the annual office party blow-out, Colin woke up with a pounding headache, cotton-mouthed, and utterly unable to recall the events of the preceding evening.
After a trip to the bathroom he was able to make his way downstairs, where his wife put some coffee in front of him.
"Louise," he moaned, "Tell me what went on last night. Was it as bad as I think?"
"Even worse," she assured him, voice dripping with scorn.
"You made a complete ass of yourself, succeeded in antagonizing the entire senior management and insulted the Regional Director General to his face."
"He's an a**hole. I should have pissed on him."
"You did," Louise informed him. "And he fired you."
"Well, screw him!" yelled Colin.
"I did. You're back at work on Monday."
President Bush and Colin Powell are sitting in a bar.
A guy walks in and asks the barman, "Isn't that Bush and Powell sitting over there?"
The barman says, "Yep, that's them."
So the guy walks over and says, "Wow, this is a real honor. What are you guys doing in here?"
Bush says, "We're planning WW III."
And the guy says, "Really? What's going to happen?"
Bush says, "Well, we're going to kill 140 million Iraqis this time and one beautiful blonde."
The guy exclaimed, "A beautiful blonde? Why kill a beautiful blonde?"
Bush turns to Powell and says, "See, I told you no one would worry about the 140 million Iraqis!"
G.W. Bush was very depressed that people were saying he's stupid, so he calls his good friend, Queen Elizabeth who says, "Now George, what you need to do is surround yourself with smart people. Let me demonstrate." She calls in Tony Blair and asks, "Tony, your parents had a baby. It's not your sister, nor is it your brother. Who is it?"
"It's me," answers Mr. Blair.
George then calls Dick Cheney and says, "Dick, your parents had a baby. It isn't your sister and it's not your brother. Who is it?"
"Gee, that's a tough one George," Cheney says. "Let me get back to you."
Cheney then calls Colin Powell and says, "Colin, your parents had a baby. It isn't your sister and it's not your brother. Who is it?"
"It's me!" answers Colin Powell.
Cheney immediately calls Bush and says, "It's Colin Powell!"
"No, you fool. It's Tony Blair!" replies Bush.