Collector Jokes / Recent Jokes

The Mafia was looking for a new man to make weekly collections from all the private businesses that they were "protecting." Feeling the heat from the police force, they decide to use a deaf person for this job. If he were to get caught, he wouldn't be able to communicate to the police what he was doing. Well, on his first week, the deaf collector picks up over $40,000. He gets greedy, decides to keep the money and stashes it in a safe place. The Mafia soon realizes that their collection is late, and sends someo of their hoods after the deaf collector. The hoods find the deaf collector and ask him where the money is. The deaf collector can't communicate with them, so the Mafia drags the guy to an interpreter. The Mafia hood says to the interpreter, "Ask him where da money is." The interpreter signs, "Where's the money?" The deaf man replies, "I don't know what you're talking about." The interpreter tells the hood, "He says he doesn't know more...

The mafia was looking for a new man to make weekly collections from all the private businesses that they were 'protecting'. Feeling the heat from the police force, they decided to use a deaf person for this job-if he were to get caught, he wouldn't be able to communicate to the police what he was doing.Well, on his first week, the deaf collector picks up over $50,000. He gets greedy, decides to keep the money and stashes it in a safe place. The mafia soon realizes that their collection is late, and sends some of their hoods after the deaf collector. The hoods find the deaf collector and ask him where the money is. The deaf collector can't communicate with them, so the mafia drags the guy to an interpreter.The mafia hood says to the interpreter, "Ask him where da money is."The interpreter signs, "Where's the money?"The deaf replies, "I don't know what you're talking about."The interpreter tells the hood, "He says he doesn't know what you're talking more...

The mafia was looking for a new man to make weekly collections from all the private businesses they were 'protecting'. Feeling the heat from the police, they decided to use a deaf person for the job. That way, should he get caught, he would be unable to communicate to the police what he was doing. During his first week on the job, the deaf collector picks up over $60,000. He quickly becomes greedy, decides to keep the money and hides it in a safe place. Realizing that their collection is late, the mafia sends some of their hoods after the deaf collector. The hoods find the deaf man and ask him where the money is. Since the deaf collector is unable to communicate with them, they drag him to an interpreter. The mafia hood tells the interpreter, "Ask him where da money is." The interpreter signs "Where's the money?" to the deaf man. The deaf man signs back, "I don't know what you're talking about." The interpreter says to the hood, "He says he doesn't more...

A famous art collector is walking through the city when he notices a mangy cat lapping milk from a saucer in the doorway of a store. He does a double take.He knows that the saucer is extremely old and very valuable, so he walks casually into the store and offers to buy the cat for two dollars.The storeowner replies, "I'm sorry, but the cat isn't for sale."The collector says, "Please, I need a hungry cat around the house to catch mice. I'll pay you 20 dollars for that cat."And the owner says "Sold," and hands over the cat.The collector continues, "Hey, for the twenty bucks I wonder if you could throw in that old saucer. The cat's used to it and it'll save me from having to get a dish."The owner says, "Sorry buddy, but that's my lucky saucer. So far this week I've sold sixty-eight cats."

Pulling up to the toll both Jack handed the collector a $100. 00 bill. Looking incredulously at the bill, the collector, in a snappy tone, exclaimed "I can't break this! I need exact change." "Come on buddy." Jack pleaded, "Can't you give me a break, just this once?" "Nope. Sorry. Exact change!" Answered the collector." While thumbing through the change in his ashtray Jack asked the collector, "Do you really like this job?" "Well it's not the best job that I've ever had, but it pays the bills," replied the collector. "what do you do for a living?" he asked. Still counting change and without looking up Jack said, "I'm a rectum stretcher." "A what?" asked the collector." A rectum stretcher." Jack replied, giving the collector a slideways glance." What does a rectum stretcher do?" The collector asked." Well just as the name implies, I stretch rectums." Jack more...