Complained Jokes / Recent Jokes

A young doctor moved to a small, remote town to replace the elderly doctor who was preparing to retire. When he was making his rounds, the older doctor suggested that the younger one accompany him so the residents could meet him and get used to having a new doctor.
The woman at the first house they visited complained of feeling sick to her stomach.
The older doctor said, "Perhaps you've been overdoing it with the candy and sweets. Why not cut back on the amount you've been eating and see if that does the trick?"
As they left, the younger doctor said, "How on earth did you come to your diagnosis so quickly? You didn't even examine that woman."
"I didn't have to examine her," explained the older doctor. "You noticed I dropped my stethoscope on the floor in there? Well, when I bent over to pick it up, I noticed a lot of candy wrappers in the trash. Most likely, that was what was causing her to feel sick."
"Pretty more...

One day a wife complained, "This wall clock almost killed my mother today. It fell only seconds after she got up from the couch." The husband grunted and replied, "The darn clock always was slow."

Neighbors had complained to the mayor about the noisy pub on the corner of 3rd & Lambourne. Seems that the old cronies got together every friday & saturday, played cards, drank beer, told lies and jokes until 2am Saturday morning, when the pub had to close.
Officer Redding, parked down the street was not amused. He checked his watch, noted it was 01:55, time for the old drunks to start leaving. If he hadn't been assigned this crap detail he'd be down at the I-80 Truck stop about now having a nice hot cup of coffee. Redding pulled out a cigarette and was about to light up when the door of the pub slammed open and an old geezer stumbled out. Redding put the smoke back in the pack; he was "on point" now.
The old man stumbled around, fished his car keys out of his pocket, dropped them a couple of times, finally found them and weaved down the sidewalk and across the road to his car.
Redding started his engine, watching carefully as the old man fumbled to unlock his more...

Neighbors had complained to the mayor about the noisy pub on the corner of 3rd & Lambourne. Seems that the old cronies got together every friday & saturday, played cards, drank beer, told lies and jokes until 2am Saturday morning, when the pub had to close.Officer Redding, parked down the street was not amused. He checked his watch, noted it was 01:55, time for the old drunks to start leaving. If he hadn't been assigned this crap detail he'd be down at the I-80 Truck stop about now having a nice hot cup of coffee. Redding pulled out a cigarette and was about to light up when the door of the pub slammed open and an old geezer stumbled out. Redding put the smoke back in the pack; he was "on point" now.The old man stumbled around, fished his car keys out of his pocket, dropped them a couple of times, finally found them and weaved down the sidewalk and across the road to his car.Redding started his engine, watching carefully as the old man fumbled to unlock his door. Other more...

This is about a day when Mr. Zail Singh was the President of
the country.
All sardars in the country went to him this day and told him
that people
tease them by making jokes about them that when the clock
stucks 12: 00,
all sardars go mad and act like crazy. They complained that
this is not
true. They also complained that people talk about sardar
having no common
sanse. Therefore, they demanded him to go bring for them
common sense.

Mr. Zail Singh was confused and asked his secretary to give
him some suggestions. The secretary advised him to go to Japan, since quality is guaranteed.

The next day Mr. Zail Singh rushes off to Japan. At the
Osaka Airport he
hires a cab and asks him to take him to a shop where he
can get common sense.

The cab driver was pissed, he told him that there is no shop
in Japan that sells such stuff. Infact every human being has common sense since more...

There were four 80-year old men playing golf. One complained the hills were to high. The second complained the bunkers were too deep. The third said the holes were too wide. The fourth one said, "Shut up! At least we're still on the right side of the grass!"

"Doctor!" complained the patient; "I keep seeing spots before my eyes."
The doctor scratched his head. "Why have you come to me?
Have you seen an ophthalmologist?"
"No," replied the patient, "just spots."