Compliant Jokes

While we believe we will be fully Y2K compliant by January 1, 2000, and most of our subsidiary units and contractors claim they will also be fully compliant, we obviously need to make some preparations in case unexpected challenges impair our ability to meet the needs of our customers.

Enclosed with this memo is a "Y2K Backup System" device designed to meet short time emergency needs in case of a computer operations failure, or operational delay. This device is the company's Primary Emergency Network Computer Interface Liaison device (P. E. N. C. I. L.).

This device has been field tested extensively, including certification testing, as well as volume and stress testing. Properly maintained, the device meets all the requirements for coding and data input. Prior to use, the (P. E. N. C. I. L.) will require preparation and testing. Tools and supplies required will be: A sharpened knife or grinding device; and a supply of computer paper (with or without more...

While we believe we will be fully Y2K compliant by January 1, 2000, and most of our subsidiary units and contractors claim they will also be fully compliant, we obviously need to make some preparations in case unexpected challenges impair our ability to meet the needs of our customers.
Enclosed with this memo is a "Y2K Backup System" device designed to meet short time emergency needs in case of a computer operations failure, or operational delay. This device is the company's Primary Emergency Network Computer Interface Liaison device (P.E.N.C.I.L.).
This device has been field tested extensively, including certification testing, as well as volume and stress testing. Properly maintained, the device meets all the requirements for coding and data input. Prior to use, the (P.E.N.C.I.L.) will require preparation and testing. Tools and supplies required will be: A sharpened knife or grinding device;and a supply of computer paper (with or without holes).
Gripping the more...

An acquaintance, having seen a great many inquiries about whether his
company's software is Year 2000 compliant, is considering using this as
his new standard response:

We are quite confident that all of our systems are Year 2000 Compliant.

However, we have over a two year backlog of Year 2000 Compliance forms to
fill out, so according to our scheduling database, you should hear back
from us in June, 1900.