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THE INVISIBLE KILLER
Dihydrogen monoxide is colorless, odorless, tasteless, and kills uncounted thousands of people every year.
Most of these deaths are caused by accidental inhalation of DHMO, but the dangers of dihydrogen monoxide do not end there.
Prolonged exposure to its solid form causes severe tissue damage. Symptoms of DHMO ingestion can include excessive sweating and urination, and possibly a bloated feeling, nausea, vomiting and body electrolyte imbalance.
For those who have become dependent, DHMO withdrawal means certain death.
Dihydrogen monoxide: is also known as hydric acid, and is the major component of acid rain. contributes to the "greenhouse effect." may cause severe burns. contributes to the erosion of our natural landscape. accelerates corrosion and rusting of many metals. may cause electrical failures and decreased effectiveness of automobile brakes. has been found in excised tumors of terminal cancer patients.

Charming as a carbuncle.
Cheats when filling out opinion polls.
Cheezwiz for brains.
Chimney’s clogged.
Clock doesn’t have all its numbers.
Collects cards for Craig.
Communications with him is limited to ping.
Confused as a baby in a topless bar.
Consumes hard drugs as vitamins.
Contributes to collections like this one without searching first to see if their little gem is already listed.
Contributes to the population problem.
Could be considered a plant if he developed photrophic motility.
Could only be loved/missed if the minister read someone else’s eulogy.
Couldn’t balance a checkbook if Einstein helped.
Couldn’t count to 21 if he were barefoot and without pants.

Dihydrogen monoxide is colorless, odorless, tasteless, and kills
uncounted thousands of people every year. Most of these deaths are caused
by accidental inhalation of DHMO, but the dangers of dihydrogen monoxide
do not end there. Prolonged exposure to its solid form causes severe
tissue damage. Symptoms of DHMO ingestion can include excessive sweating
and urination, and possibly a bloated feeling, nausea, vomiting and body
electrolyte imbalance. For those who have become dependent, DHMO
withdrawal means certain death.
Dihydrogen monoxide:
is also known as hydroxl acid, and is the major component of acid rain.
contributes to the "greenhouse effect."
may cause severe burns.
contributes to the erosion of our natural landscape.
accelerates corrosion and rusting of many metals.
may cause electrical failures and decreased effectiveness of
automobile brakes.
has been found in excised tumors of terminal cancer more...

Charming as a carbuncle.

Cheats when filling out opinion polls.

Cheezwiz for brains.

Chimney's clogged.

Clock doesn't have all its numbers.

Collects cards for Craig.

Communications with him is limited to ping.

Confused as a baby in a topless bar.

Consumes hard drugs as vitamins.

Contributes to collections like this one without searching first to see if their little gem is already listed.

Contributes to the population problem.

Could be considered a plant if he developed photrophic motility.

Could only be loved/missed if the minister read someone else's eulogy.

Couldn't balance a checkbook if Einstein helped.

Couldn't count to 21 if he were barefoot and without pants.

Calls people to ask them their phone number. Can be outwitted by a jar of Marshmallow Fluff. Can discern facts and form predictions with the acumen of an economist. Can easily be confused with facts. Can only remember her old passwords. Can only shoot pool with a left-handed cue stick. Can't distinguish jacking off and stropping a razor. Can't find log base two of 65536 without a calculator. Can't program his way out of a for-loop. Car's only got three wheels, and one's going flat. Carrier wave unmodulated. Carries a tire gauge in her purse. Cart can't hold all the groceries. Cauliflower for brains. Changes hands and picks up a stroke. Charming as a carbuncle. Cheats when filling out opinion polls. Cheezwiz for brains. Chimney's clogged. Clock doesn't have all its numbers. Collects cards for Craig. Communications with him is limited to ping. Confused as a baby in a topless bar. Consumes hard drugs as vitamins. Contributes to collections like this one without searching first to see if more...