Corny Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q. How do you put a giraffe into the fridge? A. Open the fridge, put it in, and close the door. Q. How do you put an elephant in the fridge? A. You open the door take out the giraffe, put the elephant in, and close the door. Noah invited all the animals to a meeting on how to cross the alligator infested waters. Q. How did they do it? A. They walked across. The alligators were at the meeting. Q. Who wasn't at the meeting? A. The elephant, he was in the fridge.

There was this guy who keeps bragging around about his balls. One day at a bar he met a fellow and said, " Hello, man! Your Balls plus my balls equals FIVE BALLS!" "Wow! you've got THREE balls? That's amazing!" replied the fellow. Then he met another bloke and told the same thing: " Hello, man! Your Balls plus my balls equals FIVE BALLS!" "Really? You have Three balls!!!" said the bloke. "How incredible!" This guy went to talk to other men, all were impressed of his unusual number of balls... Until he met the last dude. He told the dude, " Hello, man! Your Balls plus my balls equals FIVE BALLS!" the dude replied- "WHAT?! YOU ONLY GOT ONE BALL?"

How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb?

A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"
The bartender replies, "For you, no charge."

Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off so who is left? Repeat.

Q: What do you get when you cross the world's best fairy tale teller with the world's worst mammal? A: A Whale of a Tale

One day three guys were driving in the middle of nowhere when their car broke down. They got out and looked around at their surroundings.
Finally, the first guy says, "I'm gonna go look for some food."
The other two guys say, "Why?".
"So we can eat of course." says the first guy.
Once the first guy comes back the second guy says, "I'm going to go get some water".
"Why" asked the other two.
"So we can drink it if we get thirsty of course".
Once the second guy gets back the third guy goes and tears off the car door.
"Whats that for?" asked the other two.
" In case we get hot we can roll down the window."