Cowboy Jokes / Recent Jokes
The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a bar and sat down to drink a beer. After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said "Who owns the big white horse outside?" The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his gun belt, and said, "I do... Why?" The cowboy looked at the Lone Ranger and said, "I just thought you'd like to know that your horse is about dead outside!"The Lone Ranger and Tonto rushed outside and sure enough Silver was ready to die from heat exhaustion. The Lone Ranger got the horse water and soon Silver was starting to feel a little better. The Lone Ranger turned to Tonto and said, "Tonto, I want you to run around Silver and see if you can create enough of a breeze to make him start to feel better." Tonto said, "Sure, Kemosabe" and took off running circles around Silver. Not able to do anything else but wait, the Lone Ranger returned to the bar to finish his drink. A few minutes later, another cowboy struts into the bar and more...
There once was a Chinese waiter that worked at a bar. One day a man came in and sat down. The Chinese waiter walked up to him and said,
"
Can I get you something?"
And the man said "
A coke, please"
and so the Chinese waiter went to get the coke. He came back and gave the coke to the man and awaited as he drank it. Then the man spat it out, and the Chinese waiter burst out in laughter and said, "
Me Chinese, me play joke, me put Pee Pee in your coke!"
For the Chinese waiter had placed pee into the man's coke and the man left angrily.
And so the Chinese waiter continued his joke on and on again, customer after customer. Soon enough a cowboy stopped by and the Chinese waiter came up to him and asked if he could get him something and the cowboy said, "
a coke"
and so the Chinese waiter went and brought him one, as he waited for the cowboys reaction. Then the cowboy spat it out very angrily. Then the more...
One Sunday a cowboy went to church. When he entered, he saw that he and the preacher were the only ones present. The preacher asked the cowboy if he wanted him to go ahead and preach.
The cowboy said, "I'm not too smart, but if I went to feed my cattle and only one showed up, I'd feed him."
So the minister began his sermon.
One hour passed, then two hours, then two-and-a-half hours. The preacher finally finished and came down to ask the cowboy how he liked the sermon.
The cowboy answered slowly, "Well, I'm not very smart, but if I went to feed my cattle and only one showed up, I sure wouldn't feed him all the hay."
Q: What do Tornados and Dallas Cowboy fans have in common?
A: Sooner or later, they'll both end up in trailer parks!
What did the cowboy maggot say when he went into the saloon bar? Gimme a slug of whiskey.
Who is in cowboy films and is always broke? Skint Eastwood.
On a hot, dusty day a cowboy rode into a small frontier town. After dismounting, he walked behind his horse, lifted it's tail and kissed it where the sun don't shine. An old man rocking by the general store witnessed the whole thing."Whatya do that fer?" he asked."Got chapped lips," the cowboy replied. The old man asked, "Does that help?"The cowboy said, "No, but it keeps me from lickin' 'em."