Cross Jokes / Recent Jokes

What do you get if you cross a tarantula with a rose? Im not sure, but I wouldnt try smelling it!

How did the blonde try to kill the bird... she threw it off of a cliff. How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves... she fell out of the tree. How did the blonde die, drinking milk... the cow stepped on her. How did the blonde burn her nose... bobbing for french fries. Why does a blonde only change her baby's diapers every month... the instructions stated, "good for up to 20 pounds". Why do blondes have see-through lunch box tops... so they can tell if they are going to work or going home, while on the bus. Why do men like blonde jokes... it is one thing they can understand. Why do blondes like lightning... they think someone is taking their picture. Why do blondes have little holes all over their faces... from eating with forks. Why do blondes have more fun... they are easier to keep amused. What do you call a brunette with a blonde on both sides... an interpreter. What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer... frosted flakes. What do you call a fly buzzing inside a more...

Walking down the street one day, a woman heard a voice yell,' stop! If you take one more step, you will be killed. The woman stopped and seconds later a brick fell and landed in her path.
A minute later or two, she was ready to cross the street when the same voice bellowed' halt! Don`t cross the street now'. An out-of-control beer truck soon screeched around the corner and didn't even slowdown as it ran the red light. Shaken, the woman asked out loud, "who are you?"
' I am your guardian angel' replied the voice.' And I imagine you have some questions for me"
' You bet I do', the woman said.' Where were you on my wedding day?'

Did you hear about the cross eyed teacher? He couldnt control his pupils!

What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children?
If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
Pilgrims!

Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was the chicken's day off.

If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for?
Their AGE

Why can't you take a turkey to church?
Because they use such FOWL language

What are the feathers on a turkey's wings called?
Turkey feathers

What's the best dance to do on Thanksgiving?
The turkey trot

Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Yes - a building can't jump at all

What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus?
Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving

How can you make a turkey float?
You need 2 scoops of ice cream, some root beer, and a turkey

What kind of music more...

John is waiting to cross the street when a blind man approaches with his guide-dog. The sign lights to cross and in stead of helping his boss to cross the dog raises his rear leg and pees on the pants of the man. The man reaches in his pocket and gives the dog a cookie. John is amazed and tells the man: "If it were my dog I would have kicked his ass!". The man calmly answers: "I'm going to. But I need to find the head first".

What do you get if you cross a telephone with a hunting dog? A golden receiver!