Customer Jokes / Recent Jokes

A customer was bothering the waiter in a restaurant. First, he asked that the air conditioning be turned up because he was too hot, then he asked it be turned down cause he was too cold, and so on for about half an hour.
Surprisingly, the waiter was very patient, he walked back and forth and never once got angry. So finally, a second customer asked him why he didn’t throw out the pest.
“Oh, I really don’t care or mind, ” said the waiter with a smile. “We don’t even have an air conditioner. ”

Tech Support: "OK Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter' P' to bring up the Program Manager."

Customer: "I don't have a' P'."

Tech Support: "On your keyboard, Bob."

Customer: "What do you mean?"

Tech Support: "'P' on your keyboard, Bob."

Customer: "I'm not going to do that!"

The first day that a young boy went to work in the produce department at a local grocery store he was encountered by a customer with dark hair and wearing a suit. The customer told the boy that he wanted to buy a 1/2 head of lettuce. The young boy informed the customer that he would have to consult his supervisor in order to sell just a 1/2 head of lettuce. As the boy approached his supervisor he whispered “Hey, some ASSHOLE wants to buy a 1/2 head of lettuce. ” The boy then noticed that the customer was standing right behind him. The boy then said ” And this nice man would like to buy the other 1/2. ”
The Supervisor was so impressed the boy’s wit and quick thinking that he offered the boy a management position in Washington, St. The boy accepted the offer and stated that the only thing from Washington was whores and hockey players. The Supervisor said “Hey, my wife is from Washington. ” The young boy said “Oh yea, what team did she play for? ”

Customer: Do you have bacon and eggs on the menu: Waiter: No, we clean our menus regularly.

Customer: How come the Board of Health hasn't come in and closed you up? Waiter: They're afraid to eat here.

a guy was travelling in train with 4 beautiful kids. a woman next to him ask... "GREAT KIDS, R THESE URS?" guy: NO, I M REPRESENTATOR OF A CONDOM COMPANY AND THESE R "CUSTOMER COMPLAINTS"

A man goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shop owner points to three identical-looking parrots on a perch and says, "The parrot on the left costs $500."

"Why does the parrot cost so much?" asks the customer.

The owner says "Well, the parrot knows how to do legal research." The customer then asks about the next parrot, to be told that this one costs $1,000 because it can do everything the other parrot can do plus it knows how to write a brief that will win any case.

Naturally, the increasingly startled customer asks about the third parrot, to be told that it costs $4,000. Needless to say, this begs the question, "What can it do?"

To which the owner replies, "To be honest, I've never seen him do a darn thing, but the other two call him Senior Partner."