Dan Jokes

Dan: My little brother is a real pain.
Nan: Things could be worse.
Dan: How?
Nan: He could be twins!

Teacher: Is line ki english banao, usne apna kaam kiya or karta hi gya.

Santa: He done his work and done dana dan done dana dan....

President Bush, Dan Quayle, Ross Perot, and Bill Clinton all traveled together to see the Wizard of Oz. Upon arrival, they were brought to see him.

First, President Bush went to see the Wizard and said, "Everyone says I have no compassion or feelings, I wish to have a Heart". So the Wizard said, "So be it".

Second was Dan Quayle. He told the Wizard, "People think I`m unintelligent and have no common sense whatsoever. I want a brain. The Wizard said, "So be it".

Third to ask the Wizard was Ross Perot. "People say I have no confidence, and I lack conviction. I wish to have some courage". The Wizard granted this wish as well.

And then Bill Clinton approached the Wizard. The Wizard looked at him and said, "Well, what do you want?" To which Clinton replied, "I`m here for Dorothy!"

The White House is allegedly sending Dan Quayle to People's Republic of China to find out who is really in charge. Asked whether, in the current reign of terror, it might be unsafe for our beloved VP to go, John Sununu, the White House Chief of Staff,

answered: "Oh no no, in China they only persecute intellectuals."

On Tough Jobs that Involve Letters: “It’s not as easy as it looks, being on all the time. I mean, what happens if I’m in a bad mood? ” – Vanna White, “Wheel of Fortune” co-star

On Standards, the Mega-Rich and: “I’d rather not talk about money. It’s kind of gross. ” – Barbra Streisand, dodging a question about what she was paid to direct and star in The Mirror Has Two Faces

On Disco Music, Importance of: “God had to create disco music so that I could be born and be successful. ” – Donna Summer, disco singer

On Giving It Your All: “I think we played hard, but it was a lackadaisical hard. ” – New Jersey Nets guard Otis Birdsong on why his team had lost an NBA contest

On Hostage-Taking, Fun For All: “[Being taken hostage is] an adventure for the tourist, because the tourist will end up learning about the customs of the tribes as well as their good hospitality. ” – Abdullah Ahmar, speaker of Yemeni more...