Defense Jokes / Recent Jokes
Bill Clinton, Al Gore, and former Secretary of Defense William Perry wanted to go to Oz, to visit the Wizard of Oz. Bill looked at Al and asked him why he wanted to go. Al said that he needed a brain, and Bill agreed with him.
Then, Bill asked the former Secretary of Defense why he wanted to go, and he said that he needed a heart. Bill also agreed with him. Then both looked at Bill and asked him why he was going.
He answered, "I'm looking for Dorothy!"
A defense attorney was cross-examining a police officer during a felony trial -- it went like this:
Q: Officer, did you see my client fleeing the scene?
A: No sir, but I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender running several blocks away.
Q: Officer, who provided this description?
A: The officer who responded to the scene.
Q: A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?
A: Yes sir, with my life.
Q: With your life? Let me ask you this then officer, do you have a locker room in the police station, a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?
A: Yes sir, we do.
Q: And do you have a locker in that room?
A: Yes sir, I do.
Q: And do you have a lock on your locker?
A: Yes sir.
Q: Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow more...
A schoolteacher asked her primary six class to construct sentences with the words: defeat, detail, defense.
There was a pause before a pupil raised his hand and said he could make a sentence with them; "The cow jumped over defense and detail went over defeat."
Bill Clinton, Al Gore, and the Secretary of Defense all wanted to go to Oz, to visit the Wizard of Oz. Bill looked at Al and asked him why he wanted to go. Al said that he needed a brain, and Bill agreed with him. Then, Bill asked the Secretary of Defense why he wanted to go, and he said that he needed a heart. Bill also agreed with him. Then both looked at Bill and asked him why he was going. He answered, "I'm looking for Dorothy!"
Well back in 5th grade, there was this kid, Cody, and he had cards, and he was splitting us up into groups, Offense & Defense. Just think, he was puting us females on offense with him, and he was puting the males on defense. Just think what goes through 5th grade minds! EWW!!
A teacher called upon the classroom to make sentences with words previously chosen.
The teacher smiled when Pete, a slow learner, raised his hand to participate during the challenge of making a sentence with the words "Defeat," "Defense," "Deduct," and "Detail."
Pete stood thinking for a while, all eyes focused on him while his classmates awaited his reply. Smiling, he the proudly said, "Defeat of deduct went over defense before detail."
A judge enters the courtroom, strikes the gavel and says, "Before I begin this
trial, I have an announcement to make. The lawyer for the defense has paid me $15,000 to swing the case his way. The lawyer for the plaintiff has paid me $10,000 to swing the case her way. In order to make this a fair trial, I am returning $5,000 to the defense."