Demonstrating Jokes / Recent Jokes
A salesman was demonstrating unbreakable combs in a department store. He was impressing the people who stopped by to look by putting the comb through all sorts of torture and stress. Finally to impress even the skeptics in the crowd, he bent the comb completely in half, and it snapped with a loud crack. Without missing a beat, he bravely held up both halves of the' unbreakable' comb for everyone to see and said, "And this, ladies and gentlemen, is what an unbreakable comb looks like on the inside."
I went to church the other day to free my soul from sin;
I was looking for the preacher, but the preacher wasn't in.
The sexton then assured me that there'd be no use in waiting,
"The preacher's gone away," he said, "to do some demonstrating."
I asked for the assistant - the next in line would do.
"Sorry," said the sexton, "he's demonstrating, too."
"Well, what I want to know," I said, "and I'll make myself quite clear,
While they're off demonstrating, who's running things down here?
"Who's taking care of sinners? Who's leading us in prayer?
Who's feeding all the lost sheep that wander by right here?
Who's baptizing the babies? and, another thing," I said,
"Who's looking out for the sick folks and blessing all the dead?"
The sexton was a wise old man with a twinkle in his eye;
He looked at me and scratched his head, and this was his reply:
"Son, what more...
A Cyberspace friend of mine here in Istanbul who teaches computer science to junior high-school students related the following (real) occurrence in one of his classes.
It was the early days of the school year and he was describing the machines (PCs) to the kids in general terms. As he was explaining keyboard functions he pointed out that if the computer ever got locked up (he demonstrated a lock-up) you could regain control of the machine by pressing CTRL-ALT-DEL simultaneously (demonstrating that, too).
Some of the kids objected that their hands were too small and that they weren't quick enough to hit all three keys at once.
As the teacher began explaining and demonstrating that all you needed to do was hold down CTRL+ALT with one hand and press DEL with the other, his eye happened on a boy in the front row: He had the index finger of his left hand on the left CTRL key, the index figure of his right hand on the right ALT key and after searching for the DEL key for about more...
WARNING FOR THE HUMOR IMPAIRED-THIS IS SATIRE
These are smilies :-) :-) :-) :-) :-)
Use them liberally where indicated.
There has been a considerable call for a Creationist FAQ, which
doesn't seem to be forthcoming in any great hurry. In the interests
of facilitating matters I have decided to jump the gun and provide
a provisional Creationist FAQ. Regard this as a provisional effort;
I am not an expert in these matters and may have erred in a few small
details. Criticisms and suggestions for improvement are welcome.
Speculations on my private life will be met with dignified silence.
Q: What is the principle evidence for Creationism?
A: The Holy Bible, of course. After all, is it likely that the author
of the Universe would be mistaken about its age?
Q: But isn't the Bible religion and not science?
A: Truth is truth. It's a poor sort of science that ignores truth.
Q: But isn't there a lot of evidence for evolution?
A: Not more...