Donut Jokes / Recent Jokes

Day old, Daaay old
Day old donuts for one ninety-nine
Day, me say day, me say day, me say day old
Day old donuts for one ninety-nine.

Work all day in the donut shop.
Day old donuts for one ninety-nine.
Some are filled with jelly, Some are glazed on top.
Day old donuts for one ninety-nine.

Come Mr. Policeman, buy my aging pastry.
Day old donuts for one ninety-nine.
They are cheap, but they’re not very tasty.
Day old donuts for one ninety-nine.

Half dozen, whole dozen, buy a whole bunch,
Day old donuts for one ninety-nine.
Put ‘em down at breakfast, Bring ‘em up at lunch.
Day old donuts for one ninety-nine.

Once there was a donut,
Boy was it humongous.
Day old donuts for one ninety-nine.
Took a bite and found it full of fungus.
Day old donuts for one ninety-nine.

Cheerios are donut seeds.

Why Did The Sardars Stare At The Can Of Frozen Orange Juice?
Because It Said Concentrate.
Oh Look, Daddy... Donut Seeds.

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Wenceslas
Wenceslas who?
Wenceslas train home?

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Snow
Snow who?
Snow business like show business!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Wayne
Wayne who?
Wayne in a manger...!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Donut
Donut who?
Donut open till Christmas!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Oakham
Oakham who?
Oakham all ye faithfull...!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Avery
Avery who?
Avery merry Christmas!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Holly
Holly who?
Holly-days are here again!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Rudolph
Rudolph who?
Money is the Rudolph of all evil!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Igloo
Igloo who?
Igloo Suzie like I knew Suzie...!
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Mary
Mary who?
Mary Christmas!

My son just turned 10 last month and is aware I’d been writing a lot of jokes lately. I read him a couple last night. (Don’t call the Feds; I stuck to G-rated material. The kid still occasionally believes that Dreamworks characters talk when humans aren’t around.) Anyway, tonight I had a feeling he was turning the tables on me and was winding up to try a joke out. I expected knock-knock or something of the caliber of “No soap.... Radio!” Instead he said, “What shape is the hole of a donut?” I took the bait and slowly replied, “I don’t know. What shape is the hole of a donut.” He answered, “O hole.”

He went straight from diapers to R-rated punchlines? Only one person in this family is allowed to write original material. Your mom! Got that?